velocity-m

life drawing

2012-01-28T02:34:00.004+01:00

I have returned to models who wear less and stay still.

This is what happens when the sketch is inverted:

Think I'll be pursuing this for a while.

The electric bookshop

2012-01-26T22:08:00.005+01:00

An inspiring evening at Inspace, courtesy of Electric Bookshop and their guests Aidan Moffat and Chris Meade.

Electric Bookshop 5 is back for another evening of booksperimentation, bellinis and beyond-brilliant guests. This chapter, we're setting stories free from pages and exploring the possibilities of non-linear narrative.

We welcome singer songwriter Aidan Moffat and we'll hear more about his current #unravel collaboration with FOUND. Aidan will read extracts from the work which is being produced in a residency with New Media Scotland.

Chris Meade is director of if:book, an organisation dedicated to the possibilities of books and the potential of reading. We'll be discussing how the way we related to the printed word is being transformed by technology.

I feel the need to create some multimedia of my own after that.

2012-01-21T04:32:00.003+01:00

I think its time for my final museum collection twitteroetry.
Unless I think of another over breakfast.

#my26t: I spent my entire career flashing at sailors. They don’t let me do that in the museum.

2012-01-20T23:01:00.005+01:00

Happy Verse Day from Illicit Ink brought together some of literary Edinburgh's big performance poetry guns, firing words of joy, wonder, lust and sarcasm into the audience at Pulp Fiction.

Compered/ herded/ mocked by the wonderfully waistcoated wordsmith Matt Macdonald, was this stellar line-up:

Sophia Walker
Sean Martin
Amber Kennedy
Morag Edward
Mairi Campbell-Jack
Elspeth Murray
Alec Beattie
Rachel McCrum
Emily Dodd
Alison Summers
Andrew J Wilson
Andrew C Ferguson
Tracey Rosenberg
Kath McMahon

The event was so good, it actually made more than one person cry. I have never enjoyed a poetry gig so much in my life. And it just so happens that I lost my performance verse virginity at this one. Thanks, guys.

2012-01-20T23:00:00.001+01:00

Faster than witches, faster than horses, weaving a black cloth of smoke steam and ashes. #my26t

2012-01-20T22:59:00.000+01:00

Licks of magic protect our canoes. We navigate with colour through the surf. Always call us home, bird bowl. #my26t

2012-01-18T18:28:00.001+01:00

I carved music from the cottonwood trees, left a little in the forest for the spirits to pluck. #my26t

2012-01-18T06:15:00.005+01:00

I hadn't fully grasped the significance of time zones before. I knew the theory but I didn't feel it.

They're not existing simultaneously on another part of the planet, simply needing a little more expertise with the alarm clock to facilitate some skype, they've moved into another day and have left us behind still living in the day before. They're on a completely different planet.

As are we to the continents we've left behind in yesterday. They're not here yet, and when they arrive, we'll all be gone.

2012-01-17T18:04:00.001+01:00

I offered myself to you three times, trying to bring meaning to this life. Don’t mess with my head at this altitude. #my26t

2012-01-16T16:11:00.001+01:00

Fluttering on orange stained glass wings, a transatlantic aristocrat disguised by soldiers and monarchs. #my26t

2012-01-16T03:53:00.001+01:00

There’s a big moose loose aboot the hoose. #my26t

bored princesses bitch-slap with verse

2012-01-15T15:48:00.018+01:00

This month I've discovered a more malign use of verse. Not wielded by my own hand, I am just pondering on the online inky action I've witnessed in passing.

A girl, post breakup, is very happy with her liberation, in fact she'd chosen her ex's replacement some time before finally managing to get rid of him, so it was a relief for her when he actually left. But him existing competently without her is not yet an option in her pretty world, so to ensure a good grip on his attention she's been posting subtle 'my heart is sad/ if only my departed lover was here' genre poems for the world (but especially him) to see. As her heart never has nor is ever likely to break, she's doing it as a creative writing punishment exercise, but unless you know that, it's completely convincing. She writes it while sitting next to her beloved new man, grumbling that she feels a bit insulted that her ex might be thinking of dating new women already. The irony is breathtaking.

It hurt to read it, due to things I was already feeling. In addition, I think I'd always feel turmoil regarding responsibility to let a friend know all is not as it might seem (versus the strict rule of not interfering), but comms seem to be down at the moment.

In the meantime, I watch this poetry flow, I wince, and I wish I could dole out a few slaps. But the rest of me is in awe that anyone would have to imagine what it's like to feel real loss, and then be so skilled at making another person feel that pain and regret instead.

Such a good aim with words. Poet, princess or sociopath?

2012-01-15T15:42:00.005+01:00

Predator and marine engineer, he grew rapidly, constructing new coiled shell sections throughout his brief but violent life. #my26t

2012-01-15T15:42:00.003+01:00

Suspended in disbelief, no eta for a flightless bird. I've never touched an iceberg that wasn't fake. #my26t

2012-01-15T15:42:00.001+01:00

We chose cyclic polygamy over consecutive monogamy. You need a lot of rubber for this lifestyle. #my26t

2012-01-15T15:41:00.000+01:00

Bite me, fish dish. Cross my palms with food, black delivery shark. I will empty you. #my26t

2012-01-15T15:34:00.003+01:00

I stamp a monologue of lotus flowers onto skin-like paper, releasing them into the wind, the water, the earth and the fire. #my26t

2012

2012-01-05T17:06:00.004+01:00

HNY. I hope that your next 366 day journey around a star is a satisfying trip.

I don't do NY resolutions, I make todo lists. Lots of them. 2012 is for finishing the todo lists of 2001 - 2011. First todo: find lost lists.

I have no need of designated times to make new goals. I have enough trouble limiting myself to feasible courses of action throughout the year, and life will always alter my plans if I ink them in. For me, the arbitrary but psychologically effective illusion of a newly-started year is the time to finish projects and cross off things on the todo list in order, I suspect, to reach that state of serenity, achievement and liberation that is out there somewhere. Or in here, somewhere.

*You are of course welcome to look at cross-sections of my todo lists. They are, somewhat predictably, a combination of life laundry, bodywork MOT, enhanced creativity, literary collaboration, deadlines for art and words, exams, paperwork, family obligations, parachuting into disaster zones, delusional optimism, and aknowledgement that at some point, I should get A Career.

Shortest day of the year

2011-12-22T17:47:00.006+01:00

...with the longest, darkest night for stories.

So here is the first short story I ever sold. Not first published, first SOLD. Real money, what a momentous occasion. The story is called 'Dawn', written for the anthology 'Read by Dawn II', published in London by Bloody Books. I'm also in 'Read by Dawn III', but that's a whole different story.

Dawn

"Eat your breakfast darling," says mummy. But I stir the cornflakes with my spoon, washing big waves over islands and flicking flakes out of the milky ocean. I'm not hungry. Breakfast doesn't seem like such a good idea any more.

"Aren't you hungry pet? Come on, you've got to finish it." I scoop the soggy breakfast into manageable heaps and shovel it into my mouth, dribbling only a little milk down my chin. I want to go back to sleep, but after last night want just as much to stay awake.

I make the mistake of writing about the visitor in class. Mrs Dunmore reads it twice and wants to hear more during playtime and so I tell her all about it, specially how scary the dark man is and how I can’t move at all, not even to scream.

After playtime my mummy and daddy arrive at school and I'm taken out of class. We spend all afternoon in two small rooms with other grown-ups and the headmistress. I draw pictures of monsters, though I have to do the ones from Doctor Who because I’ve never seen any for real, but the teacher seems to like them, and also pictures of my house and my family. I make those up because I am getting bored and I don’t know what our roof really looks like but it should have a chimney. Then I have to tell stories about the pictures and the grown-ups ask me hundreds and hundreds of questions about the stories, I think. Even though I am too old for dolls I have to play with two, a girl doll and a boy doll, and they have all the bits like real people not dolls, which is really embarrassing and everytime I make them pretend to talk to each other all the grown ups look at each other and frown or write in notebooks.

I don’t know why they’re not listening properly but they keep misunderstanding everything I say like they’re a bit deaf or they think I’m really stupid. I keep saying I don’t know the dark man, and maybe he is a dream, and no, he’s never touched me, and that just makes them all look at each other again and now my mummy is crying again, which is really embarassing and daddy is starting to shout at all the other grown-ups and he makes my teacher cry too. I am really glad when it is time to go home, but am thinking that wasn't drama class and I am in trouble for something and there will be a natmosphere. But the grown-ups stay in one room for ages and I sit in the other with a fat lady who stares too much and says she’s a psychologist so she will understand me when I ask anything. I don't believe her.

When we go home my parents talk about the weather and holidays and food. When my brother asks about the fuss and lateness and what I’ve done wrong now they shush him and say that I have a very good imagination and might write books when I am grown up, isn’t that nice. My brother thinks that’s silly.

The next time any teacher asks us to write about something unusual in class I just write about my budgie and how he likes to eat chips. Which he does. You're not supposed to tell lies just to get out of telling the truth.

***

I wake at dawn, shivering and sweating. I don't want to open my eyes but I have to; I know it has returned. The dark shape is sitting on the end of the bed, half turned away from me, the face in shadow. It isn't looking towards me, but seems to be staring at the floor. My eyes are burning, brain switching off already, pulling me, dragging me down into sleep, my eyelids slipping down as I slip away. As my eyes close I see the head turn towards me. I wouldn't have thought it was possible to fall asleep through a thick fog of terror, but it is. It's like drowning.

The next night I wake as though someone had shaken me from a deep sleep, I think I can still feel it. The shock and confusion takes a few seconds to wear off sufficiently to realise I am briefly awake, in my bed, in my room. And that I’m not alone. The figure is sitting on my bed, but not at the end of the bed. He is sitting my feet. Every muscle, nerve and terrified thought of escape screams to stay awake but loses the battle to the chemicals of sleep numbing me, dragging me down into oblivion. As my eyelids flicker shut the head turns to look at me.

This happens almost every week now. I always think it’ll stop or that I’ll get used to the disrupted sleep, or maybe I’ll break free from the sleep paralysis and fight it but then it happens again, and I’m too tired to think about it until bedtime.

I don't dare tell anyone, no matter how scared I am or how sick I feel in the morning. By my teens I knew perfectly well what the adults will suspect: lies, abuse or insanity. Instead I stay awake as far into the night as I can, window locked, chair against the door, light on; staring at the ceiling until the first light of dawn bruises the curtains. I usually manage to get about two hours of sleep before the alarm goes off for school, but at least the sleep is undisturbed until then. I catch up on the missed sleep in college.

I must have fallen asleep shortly after lying down that night, and my thoughtful parents turning out my light on their way to bed. I don't know what time it is when I slam into consciousness, but the house is silent and dark. My breathing isn't quite under my control yet, body still more asleep than awake, and it is through half-open eyes and a vague mental haze that I register my surroundings. And see the figure sitting on the bed, head bowed away from me. It is sitting by my legs.

I examine the side of my knee in the morning, a faint purplish mark. I can't remember having hit it against anything, but it still aches. The bruise fades fast but that ache lingers.

It is almost year later when I burst out of peaceful sleep into half-waking panic and know it is in my room with me before I even open my eyes. I have to open my eyes though, have to look. It is sitting by my hips. So close I think I can hear it breathe.

Pulling on my pants in the morning I notice a small bruise on my hipbone. I'm not sure why but I immediately check the other side. There is another bruise on that hipbone too. And more bruises on my legs. I dress as fast as possible so that I can open the curtains and flood the room with sunlight and safety.

Winter comes. I go to sleep curled up small against the far side of the bed pressed right up against the wall but I wake up on my back, arms by my side. It is sitting beside me. So close it is hard to breathe, in case I brush against it. As I fall back into the panicked sleep I think it leans towards me. Over me.

When my alarm clock rings it takes me a while to be able to wake enough to reach out to hit the off button. My chest feels wheezy and heavy, ribs hurting from the inside. It has been a struggle to move my arms at all, as though every muscle is injured and weak. I think I see a bruise on my ribs as I shower, but it might have been the shadow from my breast. There aren't any other visible injuries at all this time.

Time passes. I can’t remember life being any other way.

The first time I have sex it is in the hills in the afternoon so that doesn’t count, but the first time I do it indoors at night we fall asleep in his bed. I doze off, so relaxed and warm that I am happy enough to let sleep happen. Almost. I suddenly remember and don’t know what on earth to do, already starting to ease away from the now snoring lump by my side. But as I try to move away he wraps his arms right around me and squeezes me tight, in his sleep, and I am so amazed at this unconscious protectiveness or whatever it is, that I risk settling down with him. I risk sleeping with him.

Almost two months of nights with Michael and the dark figure never arrives. I often still leap awake, hearing a noise or imagining things in my dreams, but the room is always empty, just me and my boyfriend. I think he might be surprised that he’s been made so welcome at my flat so fast, but I don’t want to be alone in the dark anymore. But I am so fed up with that him he gets the message and leaves, and I go to sleep alone. When I wake at dawn the room is dimly lit by the street lamp sodium glow. I am frozen in half-sleep but my eyes are open and I can see the dark figure is on my bed leaning towards me.

In the shower I see the three small cuts across my ribs and one on my neck. I clean them up, get dried and dressed, and phone Michael to ask him to come back, and to move in properly. I loved being married, cuddling up to someone to spend the night safe and warm now. The fear of sleep eventually fades, and I store memories of those bad nights with all the other nightmares, regrets and doubts. If I wake now the only thing in my bedroom is my husband, and that is the way it should be. There is nothing in the shadows, nothing on the end of the bed, nothing in the room at all. I feel as though I've escaped into a better place. As long as his arms are around me, nothing comes near me at night, in sleep, dreams or wakefulness.

I don't know when it all changes. He still seems happy and we have life pretty well sorted out now. But I’m beginning to feel as though I have become my own husband's mistress, an extra to his life. I know he hasn’t been unfaithful, but whatever is his main partner, it isn't me. I don't know if it is his work, his mates, his past or his hobbies, but they are what he is really married to. We don't live life together, we live parallel paths. When he finishes whatever he is doing, he comes home to me, we have a bit of fun, and after a while I can see that he’s looking forward to getting back to it all. Half of his mind is already out there, but any attempt to draw him in and question it is denied with such fervour that it would seem that he at least believes what he is saying. But loved as I am, I know I’m not his most favourite thing, and that sort of downsizing eats away at a person's morale. We bicker, restlessly. By the end of the year I've got rid of him altogether.

It is hard to sleep alone. The novelty of clean fresh sheets and a peaceful bed to stretch out in soon wears off and the room just feels empty. I turn to say something, share something, move closer for warmth and then realise I don't have anyone, that it is just me now. I tried to remind myself it was like that even when he was with me, but my mind is already making him seem more of a partner than he actually was, and I feel the loneliness as though it is something new. Sometimes I think I feel his arms around me as I fall asleep, but when I wake I remember and realise.

It takes a few months before I grow accustomed to the silence, but I’m not as calm as I had been. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the nerves and emptiness at night.

I wake with a jump in the darkness. It is a huge shock to the system to go from peaceful sleep to full alertness and my skin bristles and sweats and my heart hammers as though trying to escape from my ribcage again. It will only be a brief break to sleep though, as soon as I am awake I am already starting to fall asleep again, dragged back down from the panic as though drugged. My eyelids are still open but my body is still immobilised by sleep hormones; comatose, breathing audible and on automatic, slowing, sleepy. It is now that I vaguely focussed on the shape in the room, the figure that is sitting on the bed by my side. It is half turned away from me, the face in shadow, silhouetted against the faint glow of the curtains. It isn't looking towards me, but seems to be staring at the floor.

My heart races faster and hammers harder, breath failing to catch up, eyes burning with the effort of keeping them open. But my treacherous brain is switching off in the background, trying to drag me down into unconsciousness. But as my eyes start flicker closed I see the head turn towards me, and then lean down right over me, blocking out the dawn.

I reach out to embrace it.

Edinburgh knotwork

2011-12-14T23:02:00.013+01:00

A strange thing happened in St Giles' at the weekend; I saw it as though I'd never been there before. I genuinely didn't recall it being so breathtakingly ornate. I felt disconcerted by the experience but I've been disconcerted by a lot recently. I took refuge inside my neglected sketchbook.

I was there to hear the Rudsambee company of singers performance, featuring truly rud sam bith idir music as the playlist spanned Nigeria to Korea. Rudsambee is in the talented hands of Ollie Singleton nowadays, taking over from Frances Cockburn, who went on to create the Wild Myrtles - who I went to see tonight.

Alas, at Blackwell's, the Wild Myrtles a cappella plans were thwarted by soprano lurgy, but we still had Cargo writer Allan Wilson, and the founder of the Scottish Poetry Library, the poet Tessa Ransford, to listen to while swigging mulled wine.

You can rely on Blackwell's bookshop for providing interesting evenings, and now I know they can be relied on for excellent homemade lebkuchen too. Danke.

This brings this past month of escapism full circle, back to when I illustrated a short story by Edinburgh playwright Mary Paulson-Ellis for 26 Stories of Christmas. The illustration was of lebkuchen.

I don't feel any more grounded, or inky, but I am now quite full of German biscuits.

speak up, speak out

2011-12-08T15:23:00.011+01:00

I have been most distracted for several weeks now. In the process of seizing the day with awesome decisiveness, I simultaneously suffered bouts of being very withdrawn and faffy, which I find irritating in others and of course in myself - if I notice, which I didn't really as I was so busy being. With some irony I wanted more interaction and less introspection. I have noticed now, so I'm back out, slapping self around the head.

The thing is, I had suddenly seen - and felt - in my extremely talented friend's writing the sort of things I should be, could be, wanted to, and had been writing, and realised how far off track I was in myself right now. It wasn't the time to digest and process a crisis of angst in the literary department or aknowledge what it did to my identity as a writer and therefore as a confident person. I suspect that's called denial. Creatives can inwardly unravel at the drop of a black hat (especially when listening to someone else read their work aloud)

I see now that I'm not an inadequate writer, I've simply outgrown what I was writing, have had enough of entertaining performance frivolity for now, and have enormous pangs to get back into what would feed my needs more. Something raw and real to me. So yes, it seemed like a shock to the system, but one my writing needed, as deep down I already knew. After all, I stopped writing The Whale's Pyjamas (a harsh novel) and turned to cabaret stage work with some self-awareness of what I was avoiding. An obvious balance would be to write both, not stay immersed in only one, duh.

In more tangible news I was shortlisted for the Scottish Book Trust mentorship but due to a monumental email misunderstanding, I haven't got an interview, which is a blow. Not sure what will happen about that.

I was published this week illustrating day 5 of 26 Days of Christmas, for a sweet short written by the talented Mary Paulson-Ellis. Speaking of 26, I finally saw the cold carved seacup in the flesh from '26 Treasures at the V&A' in 2010. when wandering round the V&A during the month's strange, challenging but intermittently wonderful travels with my friend East.

I missed the professor's visit yesterday, but her avenue into forensic art has given me a glimpse of something that I might like to pursue. The invitation to help paint the mural for the panda enclosure at Edinburgh Zoo went silent, so either they found another team or they ran out of money for it. There are, however, imminent art exhibitions and literary events anticipating my collaboration, I'm going to meet up with publishers I'd like to work with, and Writers' Bloc is already booked up for February events on both coasts, so I already have targets I don't have to install by myself. The ink, however, must be carved, and it must be carved by me.

Doodling contd.

2011-10-18T16:56:00.015+02:00

In response to the now very familiar question 'do you have a website?' I'm afraid that the answer is still no. Not a stubborn no, simply a 'in five years it hasn't ever reached the top of the to do list' no. It may yet happen.

Some years ago, while moving house and having packed everything except the essentials (computer, bed, toaster, pencil case) my story was rejected by 'Postcards From Hell' in the US. It just so happened that two of their chosen writers were local pals Andrew C Ferguson (The Cabinet of Dr Calamari) and Hannu Rajaniemi (Satan's Typist), so I offered to do them a doodle for their postcards. I inked ideas for drawings onto scraps of card, then scanned and emailed, but the publisher bought them on the spot as they were, and asked me to do the artwork for the lead story 'Dark Wine' too.

You should see the ink I get through. In my defence I'm stuck in bed a lot of the time, b)I don't have access to a huge sculpture workshop, c) I'm short of year-round nudes and d) I don't have to check my spelling if I draw the idea rather than write it. Handy at 4am.

So I spose I'm inadvertantly a reluctant sort of illustrator by accident in disguise. Ninja sketcher. I don't mind showing you a couple more drawings now that you know my secret. Don't tell anyone.

This is from a set of fifteen angels:

And the loveheart:

You might recognise this angry faerie from Andrew C Ferguson's book 'The Secret of Scottish Football':

This is one of my 'festive' designs, exhibited as part of the Edinburgh arts collective KMSO, which also sells all of the exhibited artwork as prints and gift cards online:

I even do colour, about once a decade, as demonstrated here in the chart of the Scottish St Ayles skiff fleet of summer 2011:
I helped build one of those boats.

October in a bun

2011-10-17T15:27:00.011+02:00

Some of you may know the renowned bilingual school Bunsgoil Crois na Cìse in Edinburgh (Tollcross Primary School). Earlier this year I was adopted by Mrs McPhail's p4/ p5 class to work with extracts from my story 'Island of Doom', weaving me into the curriculum to look at short story writing, storytelling, translation, illustration and performance, as well as islands in the Forth and local history.

I can report that there has been no audience as daunting as that semi-circle of little faces looking up at me when I read the story to them. I have not been hit by nerves that affected my reading before. Their enthusiasm and excitement for the story has been the biggest reward, and I can only hope that they've enjoyed working on it since. Last week the class presented a short Gaelic version of it to the parents at the end of term assembly, complete with their own drawings on a screen in the background, and I was completely bowled over. I'm looking forward to Tollcross returning next term.

This last month or so has passed in a blur of music. For the days pottering indoors, it is good for my soul to find musicians, better still, musicians who want me to join in. The best medicine of all is inclusion. I confess I've neglected everyone else around me, mainly because I needed this non-verbal time out.

This weekend saw the return of the strange but fabulous West Port Book Festival. Held in bookshops in and around the city's Pubic Triangle. As the publicity says, 'The West Port is Edinburgh’s Soho, a heady mix of booze, bosoms, bespoke tailoring and BOOKS'. I loved it.

WPBF Copyright panel discussion:

Tweeting reports from the Scottish Poetry Library:

Traverse Open Mic (unfortunately missing my flatmate on stage):

As you can see, I normally sketch at a frantic speed, with only four minutes for the open mic at the Traverse pic above, but at Janice Galloway's brilliant event I had the rare treat of an hour with my target talking right in front of me.

For full coverage of the festival, have a look at literary shutterbug Chris Scott's set on Flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/chrisdonia/sets/72157627777438949/

The thing about his varied lenses is that you never know when he's sneaking a shot...

Today I'm wrapped up in my bed watching a small bedraggled fledgling magpie shelter on the birdtable outside my window.

The yurt doodler emerges, two weeks later...

2011-09-07T13:58:00.035+02:00

I've read several excellent blogs about the book festival (what do you mean which book festival; THE book festival) Some were written en route and some in the afterglow, but I was always in the process of being immersed in or recovering from each day there, so I didn't write either kind.

(sod off and let me sleep)

For me the Edinburgh International Book Festival is of particular significence because I often find it so hard to travel, in fact it's been impossible to get further than Fife recently, and most weeks Edinburgh itself is largely implausable. This means I can't go to far-off locations. Something as exotic as Australia will have to wait until I'm (in)famous enough to entice a volunteer. But once a year, the literature industry from all round the world comes to my city. I'm not saying I put myself under pressure to make the most of this brief but glorious opportunity, but...

Two weeks later I'm still I'm still recovering. Words are not flowing quite as coherently as usual. I suspect there may never be much of a personal diary of the festival from me as so much of it is a blurred memory of excitement, familiar faces, familiar voices, lovely audiences of fellow word-addicts, blue lanyards bearing famous names, green lanyards bearing unexpected names, astonishing talent, creative inspiration, the most friendly and reassuring staff I've ever met, exciting publishing contacts (all fingers are crossed) and utter exhaustion, plus of course, those exquisite little strawberry cakes. I don't know who catered the events but WOW.

I was part of 'Electric Lit Orchestra', Writers' Bloc's Unbound night in the EIBF Spiegeltent, my own performance a duet with the cellist Lindsay Martindale, who did a wonderful job of musically illustrating the story. We all had a fantastic time, and were relieved to hear that the audience and staff enjoyed the night too. For a list of performances, writers and musicians, check out http://www.writers-blog.org.uk/

Then I sketched.

One of my favourite pastimes is life drawing. The (human, clothes optional) model sits very still and I can lose myself in mark making. I know, I thought, I haven't done any life drawing for ages, I should make the most of these freerange inadvertant models and sketch in the yurt. Oh yes.

Well, I soon learned that drawing people sitting around in the yurt may sound similar to life drawing, but it's the opposite. Ok, I was resigned to them having clothes on, but as for the poses, well, nothing in there stops moving, not for a second. People are talking, eating, rehearsing, juggling business cards, making faces while they read, gesticulating wildly or just twitching nervously. Trying to keep up with a pen produces a fairly inky page.

On the next and final day, planet EIBF excelled itself. That wee black sketchbook is a wondrous catalyst. I managed to get my wheels up onto the outdoor author area (I want to be an outdoor author when I grow up) to sketch Alasdair Gray while he sketched Will Self. I think you will all understand that under those circumstances I kept forgetting to actually draw.

From there, joining the cast of Fleck to sketch them as they rehearsed in the scarlet innards of the Writers' Retreat, then more sketching them on stage in the main theatre, seemed to be something verging on reality.

I wasn't well enough to attend much of the book festival, but when I was there I think I made the most of it. I don't want to start on anecdotes and lists of the infamous writers with whom I had conversations and surreal interactions, or try to describe the strange happenings (yet). It's still swirling around in my head (and my eyeballs are still revolving from Chris Close's visible-from-Mars camera flash when he did my portrait). I would like to thank the wonderful yurt elves, in fact all of the festival staff, who were always cheery and welcoming.

I should also apologise to some bruised toes because I really want to be allowed back in next year. Speaking of toes, here are some Fleck feet. Can you tell who it is yet?

With thanks to Chrisdonia, EIBF literary paparazzo, for his perky company during the festival, and now for allowing me to link to his photos on Flickr.

Northern exposure

2011-08-23T15:13:00.007+02:00

I feel unusually exposed today, but in a good way.

Last night saw the coastal rowing episode Ag iomradh 's a' tarraing on the documentary series Trusadh on BBC Alba (watch it on iplayer - http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b013ngxk/Trusadh_Series_3_Ag_iomradh_s_a_tarraing_(Coastal_Rowing)/

We were all filmed so I didn't expect to feature quite so much. I'm fairly competent with a script or performance piece, but I know I'm rubbish at talking off the cuff. They only used footage of me speaking English though, not Gaelic...

It is surreal to see myself featured as part of something on the water. Now I just need to find a way of getting to that enticing stretch of water without a quad bike. City of Edinburgh council stop faffing about playing Tramwars and get stuck in to basic enviromental access please. The pavement improvements mean I am back in town now, but I still want to go for a wild swim without using wheels.

Btw, I'd like to thank the lovely Daibhidh Martin and his hard-working team from Stornaway for including Rowporty in this documentary.

Portobello Regatta - how was it for you?

2011-08-09T13:50:00.016+02:00

(photo by Max Blinkhorn)

July provided several scorching weekends, but still kept some sunshine back for that final Saturday, where skiffers from around Scotland descended on Portobello for the regatta.

Members of Rowporty had taken on roles of organising, assisting and generally working hard on all sorts of tasks, some on media and skiff club liason two months ahead, right through to those up with Andres Leslie at 6am to set up on the morning of the races. Many of the Rowporty juniors joined in too, selling locally grown lavender, and skiffy t shirts. It was all worth it - the day ran smoothly.

Smooth is more than can be said for the water. It started calm with bouncy surf, then became increasingly wild as the day progressed until the 3km triangular racecourse had to be shortened for safely. The afternoon pics taken by safety boat operator/ photographer Max Blinkhorn show what seem to be rocket skiffs.

He also got some birds' eye views of the beach crowds, thanks to Rowporty founder Ali Grant (first pic of blog)

The Swim Centre did sterling work running a boot camp on the sands and free fitness testing for visitors. Rowporty members, family and friends took turns to start, scoreboard and umpire the races, and help the dedicated catering corp run the hand-made cake stall, tea and coffee stall and BBQ. I think we surpassed ourselves on cakes this year. There's a rollcall of about fifty names for this work - thank you all.

This year we also had loudspeakers to let folk watching what was happening out at sea, but I think we could have used even more of them. Bob Jefferson of Porty Online and Stan Reeves (Rowporty AND the Tollcross small traditional boats assoc) did good work manning the mic all day. Thanks also go to nearby residents helping out with power and water.

This is the race course, drawn by Patsy James (who also designed the souvenir programme)

The race results are here, added by Osbert Lancaster: http://rowporty.org.uk/private/ufwuuphrAf

Prizes were awarded on the sands down from The Beach House, straight after the last race of the day, with lustre-glazed pottery medals made by Barbara Middleton, with the help of potter Alison Robinson, with sea ribbons made by Emma Griffiths and Barbara (pic by Penny Calder)

All flags, decor, yurts and boats had to be packed away at this point, and those leaving waved off, then the remaining competitors, their friends and families grabbed a change of clothing and a quick cuppa before heading to the Dalriada where the owner, Terry, had a new trophy waiting.

Stan Reeves and Dave Cooper were in charge of music and ents, with Port Seton winning the sea shanty singing competition on the prom, then providing an excellent encore. The beachy bonfire beckoned after that, with marshmallows for the kids and something significantly stronger for the adults.

Sunday had been considered a day for relaxed time on the water for all sorts of boats, though we realised belatedly that there wouldn't be any entertainment or stalls on land for onlookers and friends who hadn't been able to make the Saturday, then discovered on the day itself that Musselburgh, just around the corner, had a huge sea festival on the go, so lots of folk hopped onto the number 26 bus or onto their bikes and headed round.

We tiptoed past those guests still asleep, took the remaining skiffs, the currach and a sailing dinghy over to Fisherrow Harbour to salute the honest lad and honest lass as they blessed the sea as part of the sea festival, then headed back to Porty. Fortunately the sky was overcast, but it was still very warm.

(photos by Morag Edward)

On our return we found several new sails out on the water, including a couple of yachts, and the shoreline packed with colourful sailing dinghies waiting to set out. Sunday may have been quietly hungover, but it was wonderful to have so much company on the water, and to have the chance to crew each other's boats.

(photo by Morag Edward)

Footage of the regatta by Penny and David Calder can be found here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUQqV0-6qyI&feature=player_embedded

Photo galleries can be found on Rowporty.org or on Flickr's Scottish Coastal Rowing group: http://www.flickr.com/groups/scottishrowing/

Please add your photos too, or send them to Rowporty, along with any feedback to help us make next year's regatta even better. There were cameras (and sketchbooks http://edinburghsketcher.com/2011/07/31/portobello-regatta-2011/) all around us!

If anyone would like to take part in next year's Portobello regatta, we have room on the prom for many, many stalls and entertainers and would love to see it looking like a beach fete. Contact morag.edward(at)rowporty.org.uk to find out more.

(Portobello beach, deserted at breakfast time on Sunday morning - photo by Lee Kindness)

friends on the road

2011-08-08T16:51:00.006+02:00

(pic: Tom and Graham preparing their bikes for very different expeditions)

Three of my friends are currently on the road, each travelling on two wheels. It doesn't feel like they've been gone very long thanks to their regularly updated blogs, but I'm looking forward to seeing them again.

If I was less ill and had some kind of powered trike with good shock absorbers, I could be tempted to try some of this for myself. The idea of trundling into a remote village and finding pals sunbathing/ singing/ snoozing outside the local pub is an enticing one.

Pauline http://symaniak.blogspot.com/ left Edinburgh last summer to cycle round the world. Graham http://gkitch.blogspot.com/ joined her last autumn to cycle across Argentina with her, and is cycling with her again this summer, this time making a documentary about their expedition across North America 'Sleepless til Seattle'.

Graham's video diary is on youtube as well https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVaNNNbQPkk&feature=player_embedded and recently they were featured on the news http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAbQ6GkmIWA

Graham and Pauline passed Fargo, the American centre point - and celebrated Pauline's first year on the road - last month, and were featured on the news http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAbQ6GkmIWA

Tom http://ruggcat.wordpress.com/ is cycling across Europe on a very stylish recumbant, funding the trek as he goes by working as a street performer. He left Edinburgh at the start of the summer, his entire kit is in a little trailer, which has been dragged behind him through every weather condition and road surface (or lack of) so far. Currently in Northern Germany, Tom has covered over 2000km and entertained onloookers in 5 countries over 75 days. He's a bloody good performer.

Portobello Regatta, 30th & 31st July 2011

2011-07-10T01:14:00.006+02:00

Not long now...

Portobello Regatta 2011

On Saturday 3oth and Sunday 31st July 2011, Portobello Sailing and Kayaking Club will host Rowporty's second Portobello Rowing Regatta, on Portobello beach, Edinburgh.

(photo by Lee Kindness: launch day races)

The skiffs races will be held on Saturday. They will gather on the sands at the foot of Bath Street from 10am, racing straight out to sea then round a triangular racecourse with one of the turns offshore from The Dalriada, then back towards the finishing line – just offshore from the Beach House. This will give onlookers on the beach plenty of racing action to watch close-up.

(photo by Patsy James: Icebreaker)

There will be music, cake stalls, raffles, entertainment and food outlets along the prom, circuit training on the sands with the Swimming Pool staff, and safe areas to paddle or swim away from the boat lanes. Bring a picnic, bring your camera, bring a bucket and spade, bring your friends! Help us cheer the competitors to victory – especially Portobello’s very own skiffs Icebreaker and Jenny Skylark.

Sunday 31st is a chance for the competitors to relax, with fun rowing and sailing for all sorts of boats out on the water, including the sailing club dinghies, currach, visiting yachts, kayaks and the century-old jolly boats.

(photo by Morag Edward: the Tollcross currach)

Saturday's competing skiffs are all clinker-built five-person rowing boats of the Scottish Coastal Rowing Project's new St Ayles design, built in the past two years by local communities as part of a recent resurgence of recreational rowing and racing in regattas around Scotland. The first of Portobello’s racing skiffs was built last year by members of Rowporty, a project of PS&KC. She was named Icebreaker by the children of Towerbank Primary School, and launched in Spring 2010. Work began on Jenny Skylark in autumn 2010, and she was named and launched in April 2011 just in time for this year’s regatta season.

(photo by Max Blinkhorn: Portobello's sister skiffs)

Last year’s Portobello Regatta was the first held in the area for over thirty years. Teams from all over Scotland will be coming to Portobello to race, including many successful competitors from last year such as Achiltibuie, North Berwick, Anstruther, Port Seton and Cockenzie, but there will also be new skiffs recently completed by their community groups.

Races are for teams under 25, open, over 40 and over 50, with men’s, women’s and mixed categories. (psssst, I'll be racing at 12 noon. If you're wondering why I'm in the men's team it's because the coxwain doesn't get a gender or age)

(photo by Morag Edward: view from the bow)

Please join us on Portobello beach and along the prom on the last weekend of July. All welcome – and it’s free! For more information about Saturday’s races, as well as photos and footage from previous regattas round the country, visit http://www.rowporty.org.uk/

***

There are also details on how to take part in Rowporty, how to invite the boats to take part in community events (see below for pic from Red Nose Day) or to hire the club to give a talk on Portobello rowing history and rowing boat restoration.

(Red Nose Row for Comic Relief Day: photo by Max Blinkhorn)

Edinburgh College of Art Degree Show 2011

2011-06-12T09:54:00.005+02:00

With last week's sizzling private views out of the way, Edinburgh College of Art's last ever independent degree show opened to the public yesterday morning.

The opening hours are Monday - Thursday 10am - 8pm, Friday - Sunday 10am - 5pm, and closing on Sunday 19th June.

http://www.eca.ac.uk/degreeshow2011/

This brilliant degree show includes the most graduates ever from the distance access degree (I'd call it the part-time degree but it's actually full-time workload with only attendance being part-time) - go see them all in studio B26!

Summer School starts on the 18th July, with a good range of classes for five-day intensive study (including an exhibition at the end of each one) and some last minute special offers. There are still a few space left, so check the brochure on http://www.eca.ac.uk/index.php?id=1617 for details. Call 0131 221 6109 Mon – Fri 9.00am – 5.00pm to book.

From August 2011 the University of Edinburgh officially takes over Edinburgh College of Art and will make whatever changes it chooses. Many changes have already been implemented, with the closure of one department, the reduction of key staff members, and instructions to the ECA Student Representative Council (who run the wonderful Wee Red Bar and the Wee Red Lounge amongst other things) being to dissolve the committee and hand over the keys.

RIP Edinburgh College of Art. Long live Edinburgh College of Art.

Sailing races at Portobello

2011-05-09T09:56:00.010+02:00

Portobello Sailing and Kayaking Club and guests took to the water yesterday, for the start of the racing season here at Portobello beach. Everything with a sail that could be sailed was unearthed from winter hibernation and dragged to the shore for an afternoon's good, laid-back racing.

I counted about ten sails on the water before their movement made accurate counting impossible, and it was indeed a grand sight to see so many sails on the water, ranging from the most high-tech new craft to the old traditional forms. Experienced sailors and first time racers all competed together, so don't be worried about not having raced before if you'd like to join in.

The water looked quite calm, with only an uncharacteristically fierce surf wave to get through/ over/ under in order to get out to the course, marked by huge yellow bouys offshore. It turned out to be harder than it looked to get past that first small but relentless obstacle of waves determined to keep the boats on the shore, as many competitors discovered.

The weather was wonderful, with a suitably huge Portobello sky: sunny bright blue with dramatic black clouds, low grey sky with hot sunshine, a morning monsoon then an equally brief and warm evening one, with a rainbow.

These races are open to members of PS&KC, and to anyone who would like temporary membership in order to race or to just try some sailing. Sailing dinghies can be borrowed from the club, including Toppers and an Enterprise. As well as the usual sail Sundays, here will be fifteen Sunday race days, culminating with the grand finale in mid-October.

http://www.sailporty.org.uk/

Guardian Edinburgh

2011-05-04T11:15:00.004+02:00

from my posterous blog last week

http://www.guardian.co.uk/help/insideguardian/2011/apr/27/guardian-local-update

I read the announcement in the online local news feed of the superb Guardian Edinburgh, that The Guardian intends to wind down the local sites for Leeds, Cardiff and Edinburgh over the next month or so, then stop them.

I was, and still am, horrified. I'm also baffled. There's a distinct feeling of betrayal in there too, not just to the communities who've benefitted from being freed from London's centrifugal force, but to the journalists who have worked so hard on this project.

I can testify that Guardian Edinburgh has transformed the way l fit into this city. I hear about events, organisations and people I'd otherwise have missed and I've met all kinds of people both online and in person. Writers' Bloc is part of their 'literary blogosphere', there have been links to my own blog when I've mentioned certain issues, and I've even had the opportunity to guest blog on several occasions, with both Tom Allan and Michael MacLeod. All this let me share some Portobello events with the rest of Edinburgh, but also gave me valuable career experience.

If this really was an experiment, then the results are conclusive: the Guardian Locals are an overwhelming and irreplaceable success. There will be a way to continue them, and, if The Guardian won't do it then we'll have to find it ourselves.

and continued here after a week's unhappy pondering about the 'experiment'...

Before Guardian Edinburgh, my news and event knowledge was gleaned from a range of good local sources: The Evening News, who sometimes covered events the day after they'd happened, with no link for the organiser; The Scotsman, who mainly covered large mainstream events and in more depth; The Guardian, who mainly covered Edinburgh in August; The Skinny, which is much less mainstream but not daily or weekly; The List, which is more mainstream but again, not daily or weekly; newsletters by being on the mailing lists of places and events of interest; plus links to local blogs where events that each blogger was following in or participating in would be mentioned.

That last method meant that to hear of twenty upcoming events or issues, I might have to read through twenty blogs. And I'd have to know of these writers or village sites in order to follow them, which meant that my feed was accidentally but heavily biased towards the activities of the literary, art, museum, uni and Portobello beach worlds of Edinburgh - or what I could find of them.

Admittedly my position as an inhabitant of Edinburgh is drastically skewed due to being stuck indoors ill for 70% of my time. It's 100% on very bad days/ weeks/ months, so I could be on the moon for all I'm actually part of the city at those times. This means I don't often get local information from posters, overheard conversations, serendipitous sightings, flyers and free magazines.

My access to - and opportunity to contribute to - local information is almost entirely via the internet, despite my being something verging on a luddite. I may not be representative of the population, but I'm a useful indication of how successfully and widely something is advertised or easy to access online. For example, thanks to their coverage of Row Porty a few weeks ago, I now know about STV local, a newly launched news site for each region of Edinburgh. http://local.stv.tv/edinburgh/. Meanwhile, through The Bike Station's online work, I'm now part of the Innertube Map project, where I'll be blogging for my local area as the Orange Line ambassador http://www.thebikestation.org.uk/innertube-map/

Unlike any other newspaper, online or otherwise, if I or anyone else feel that Guardian Edinburgh is missing some angles or topics or areas or demographics, we can change that immediately by contributing to it. Our articles or links aren't rejected as 'not newsworthy', 'not mainstream', 'not of interest to the majority', 'too local' or 'not written by a proper journalist'. You don't even have to be the person to write about it; you can just send a link to the Guardian Edinburgh journalist. I strongly suspect that this experience has liberated a lot of writers, bloggers and innovative media organisers.

Guardian Edinburgh covers what is going on in Edinburgh. I hope The Guardian can find a way to fund this valuable resource.

Innertube Map

2011-05-03T20:01:00.003+02:00

The next stage of The Bike Station's Innertube Map Project is almost upon us.

The first part of our training is over (I think!) so that when the map site goes live, we will be able to keep it up to date with the latest news happening along each line. I'm on the orange line: Portobello to Leith. I can even see some of it from my bed.

my new blog

2011-04-26T06:30:00.005+02:00

As part of the Innertube Map project, I'll be blogging about local transport, routes and events, on my new Posterous page. This is almost exactly what I have been doing on here from time to time, but it will be done more regularly, with better gadgets, links to other Innertube route bloggers and fewer mentions of writing competitions, medical news and art projects.

I have no idea how to juggle the blogs. Perhaps this one will concentrate on my progress in the worlds of painting, writing and literary schmoozing, I mean events and opportunities, around Edinburgh. That would mean that I've got to actually make some progress, so I'd better finish last year's first draft really soon...

Here is my first Posterous post: http://moragedward.posterous.com/my-first-time-coxing-portobellos-new-skiff

expanding my horizons

2011-04-21T13:43:00.006+02:00

Well, the technological ones at any rate. The actual horizon wasn't even in view yesterday. I'd been stuck in bed for most of the day but was getting mobile, so could clearly see the white curls of smokeyness rolling past my window. I suspected that either a BBQ plan had gone awry or someone was filming a B movie on the beach.

It turned out to be the latter, as the whole prom and beach had been turned into an inadvertant set for a B horror movie, with thick fog obliterating everything, glimpses of brigh sunbeams as the engineers failed to keep the fog bank solid over Joppa, and the volume of the waves turned up for dramatic effect. There were even the obligatory screams, well, squeals, as invisible people swam and splashed in an invisible sea.

I chose this as the perfect time to start making interviews with promenaders on wheels. Interview techniques, knowledge of how to actually work the technology, courage to leap out of the fog at strangers, and ability to flag down people moving faster than me, nah, all those concerns could be handled...

I actually met three people I knew for a blether too, but as they were on foot I didn't whip out my recording device and ask me to tell me about cycling on the prom, which in retrospect I ought to have done as the lack of wheels in that moment didn't necessarily mean they weren't cyclists on other days. Ah well, it was a speedy learning process, taught by the DIY method from the school of ''Just try it and see what happens'.

I didn't see any wheelchair users or skaters, so cyclists it was. I'd like to thank Julie, taking her wee son out for a supervised cycle, for agreeing to tell me a bit about cycling on the prom, and coping with the trauma of me in very-first-interview-mode, and to Callum, who took a few moments out of training for a triathalon but who didn't even get his name recorded as I'd pressed the wrong button, and to Dave for a splendid speech about Edinburgh cycle paths, after first competely traumatising me by turning out to be someone I knew online - and who'd already worked out who I was. Tis a small village!

Rowporty skiff launch

2011-04-19T12:49:00.007+02:00

It was like a summer holiday here in Porty at the weekend, in both temperature and beach crowds. Sunday morning was quiet but the lunchtime launch had a good following crowd, and by teatime the beach was packed. It seemed like a fitting welcome for the new wee skiff. So many boats in the water made for quite a spectacle.

It was a pretty breathtaking experience. Every aspect of it for me is not something to take for granted, like finding a way across the sand (quad bike!) to getting out onto the water at all let alone on such a beautiful day, and sharing a boat with people I've met thanks to Rowporty. I'd waited almost a year to get out in a skiff; an avoidable frustration that I doubt many would have tolerated, but this launch let me put all that behind me. I didn't take photos at first as I was in blissful sensory overdose. That skiff really bounces across the water when rowed fast.

It was poignant to reflect on the fact that these visitors sailing around us had built their own skiffs too, then rowed all the way round the coast to Portobello just to be part of the celebration. And being out alongside Icebreaker herself, who isn't even a year old yet, was quite an achievement, as is the currach from Tollcross, and Scratch, a skiff built single-handedly by the Rowporty website guru Osbert, and of course the hundred year old Jolly boat who was out there, still seaworthy and still as fast as a snake. As for the honour guard of oars when we launched, well, I can't think of a more overwhelming or unexpected gesture.

I will eventually write up my own experiences properly, and put it together with other people's stories, to form an overview of the launch that I suspect will be an interesting - and possibly surprisng - read. I thought getting my creaky wheels running by 11am was early, but some people had been up preparing the boats and buoys from 6am.

I'd like to thank everyone who made this launch possible, one way or another. You know what I'm like with names so this next bit may be hard. Thanks to Jonathan for starting PS&KC, to Ali, Nick and Andres who founded Rowporty, to the friendly faces in Rowporty who keep the new folk actively included in things, to all the hard workers and innovative problem-solvers, those in the background, and to those who stepped up on the day of the launch, including the amazing cake-bakers. There are others, I just don't know the details of the bits I didn't know about. Apparently our cushions were hand-made.

A personal thank you for helping me, to Max for making sure I was up, neighbour Hugh, Marianne and family, Frances and Emma the rowers who gave me a push, Patsy the rower carrying my bag o doom, Linds, Bruce and Ally for venturing out to Porty, and Steve et al for hefting me.

A Rowporty thank you to Stan the Piper, the cute wee drummer whose name I don't know, all the local kids who joined in, George, Royal West, Port Seton, Cockenzie, Newhaven, The National Lottery Heritage Fund who kindly financed part of this project and are, I hope, impressed by the quantity of heritage memorabilia and restoration project boats, The Chocolate Tree, who generously provided the large chocolate egg prize, Rowporty photographer Max Blinkhorn, Talkporty photographer Lee Kindness, Bob Jefferson, STV local reporter Rebecca, the Stornoway film crew, and all the other people armed with cameras who recorded us from every unfortunate angle on the day!

We can even thank the City of Edinburgh council for finally removing those blasted concrete blocks from the slipway at 9am on launch day - perfect timing. Now we just need a little concrete ramp at the high kerb into the boat yard, and an extended slipway down the beach to make this a truly accessible and inclusive coastal activity. Does anyone have a cement mixer they don't need this weekend..?

Rowporty will change now. The boatshed will be turned over to repairs and restoration, then at the PS&KC boatyard there will be four boats for us to look after and use. The two skiffs will be used more by teams training as the regatta season approaches, though Saturday mornings are still open to anyone who wants to join Rowporty and have a go on the skiff (sign up on Big Tent via Rowporty) if there are spaces left, and there will also be the chance to get in the B teams (the A teams are a pretty pre-determined selection) and see what it's like to race in a regatta. Fundraising and planning for the Portobello regatta has already started but there's much more work ahead.

I hope the Rowporty project continues on the right path, and becomes a really inclusive and supportive community group for everyone, not broken into groups of best friends or winning teams, as well as training up everyone to experience winning prizes at as many of Scotland's rowing regattas as possible. I think Rowporty has signed up to race in eleven regattas this season so far!

Here are a few links to photos and footage from the launch. If you have any you'd like to share, please send links here or to Rowporty.

http://local.stv.tv/edinburgh/news/15605-rowporty-unveil-their-community-built-boat/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/lkindness/sets/72157626397875627/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/versevend/sets/72157626394124139/

Please contact these photographers for permission before using any of their work.

http://www.rowporty.org.uk/

Countdown to the launch

2011-04-12T12:50:00.007+02:00

The Rowporty skiffers are in GuardianEdinburgh today: http://www.guardian.co.uk/edinburgh/2011/apr/12/portobello-boat-launch-morag-edward

Saturday will be a normal training day, and then Sunday is the launch! The new skiff will finally be released from the boatshed and into the wild...

Also in the media today, footage of the skiff(s) and some of Rowporty taken by one of our newest members: http://outdoors.caledonianmercury.com/2011/04/12/video-coastal-rowing-at-portobello/001829

Spring on Portobello beach

2011-03-25T21:19:00.011+01:00

The air is so warm we could be three months further into the year already, there's not a breath of a breeze, the sunshine is actually hot on the skin, the sea is flat calm and looking like rippled glass, so what do we do at the seaside to luxuriate in this wonderful, blissfully sunny weather? Do we lie back on the sand to watch the clouds, swim in the sea (when we can reach it) and fetch the buckets and spades from the depths of the shed to make sandcastles?

Do we heck. Buckets and spades to make sandcastles? Pah. In Edinburgh, we do it like this:

When the wild winter storms washed away part of the cliffs and much more sand than usual from the Joppa end of the beach (as well as washing away some of the gardens, sheds and wildlife) it was decided to replenish sections of the beach with sand from the other parts of the beach. Storm repair and damage control is of course vital to coastal infrastructure and flood prevention, but under the current financial climate the cost of shifting sand didn't seem justifiable, and that particular proposal didn't seem the best design of coastal protection engineering solutions anyway, in fact, it seemed to be completely cosmetic in places. However, this week the yellow beasts rolled in, and we all realised that sand shifting has apparently shot up to the top of the council's ToDo list.

I'm interested in the details, so will be reading the paperwork when I can source it. In the meantime here are these two news articles from January:

http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/topstories/Anger-at-plan-to-spend.6694182.jp
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-12217249

and the tender document:

http://www.tendersdirect.co.uk/Search/Tenders/Expired.aspx?ID=%20000000003138352§=E067&cat=15&Source=Categories

In my heatstroke haze I assume that to compensate for making the sea even further away now, an access path across the beach will (finally) be part of this new layout. I mean, look at where those big wheels are able to go on the sand this week - it's making me squeak with envy.

PS I'd like to know if those who decided sand had to be moved realised that there are things living in the sand. The lugworm population along the tideline may have been decimated, if not completely destroyed, and the razor shell population is just as fragile.

Golden Hour March

2011-03-24T00:17:00.013+01:00

I made it. For a person who was still in bed waiting for the drugs to start working at 6.30pm, I got to the glorious Forest Cafe in plenty of time for tonight's Golden Hour at 8pm. Thank you very much to my friends who came along, and a 'that was a nice surprise' hello to those familiar faces already in the Forest audience (and staff!) I saw the Crafty Green Poet in there, and some StAnza survivors too.

The slightly misnamed Forest Cafe (the cafe is only one corner of the entire three-storey building) is so much part of Edinburgh, somewhere accessible to wee wheels, somewhere safe to go on your own, somewhere to lurk, create, work, eat, sing, read or just be surprised, and a home from home for foreign students, that I can't imagine the gig anywhere else. How many Golden Hours shows have there been now? 100? Hot, sweaty, scruffy, sexy (and that's just the organiser) awesome nights, the lot of them. You can't fit that much talent in one room, even with a spoon. And it's free. And there are Golden Hour books and CDs.

Golden Hour is run by the irredeemably Ryan van Winkle. Poet and Ryan in Residence at the Scottish Poetry Library, he is sufficiently famous to get his monochrome mugshot on the washing line at the Edinburgh International Book Festival alongside all the photos of the special guests and gliterati. I'm not that famous. I get a passport photo and a post-it note. But I have now appeared at the Golden Hour! I shared the stage with a lot of talent tonight. And it was fun. I've wanted to do that for ages, and it was bloody well worth taking that many drugs for, I can tell you.

Rosie Phoenix Walker opened the night with a gripping tale of misplaced affection and even more misplaced arson.

She was followed by stonking songs from the four musicians 'Jen and the Gents' pictured above, minus the multitasking Pockets who was hidden from view behind the fiddle/ mandolin player at that point but was drumming and playing guitar. Did I mention the talent and lungpower tonight...

Then surreal animation by (insert information here tomorrow after checking spelling, tsk!)

A quick break for fresh cold air and stuff, then part two with me:

Then soulful singer-songwriter Panda Su (I recommend her CD!) and her adorable sidekick who played drum, xylophone and did something peculiar with a rubber tube:

Then more of the surreal animation (and Ryan):

and I'm afraid that's where I had to be a wuss and leave, missing the author who followed the animation. It was a relatively quiet night in the Cafe but the party is still going on, probably with Ryan reading something outrageous from Forest Publication's 'Bedtime Stories' (on sale from The Forest) by now, with another splendid band to dance to afterwards.

http://blog.theforest.org.uk/post/3817781964/golden-hour-23rd-march-8pm-this-month

I'll be back tomorrow to add photos, missing information and links, but now I must crash. The next Golden Hour will be at the Forest Cafe, 3 Bristo Place, April 20th at 8pm. BYOB.

I'll just add this - if the Forest Cafe doesn't get donations, funding and help to keep the building as it is, it will become flats or a swanky boutique hotel, and tonight's Golden Hour will have been the sixth last ever held there. Please help keep The Forest open.

http://blog.theforest.org.uk/post/4081178489/press-release-lease-terminated-but-the-forest-vows-to

creativity vs reality

2011-03-22T15:59:00.004+01:00

I find sleep arrives more easily when I empty my mind. Unfortunately that little pause in proceedings also acts as a vacuum for every new project, manuscript, storyboard, musical backing and set of images that I haven't been paying attention to all day, what with the more pressing concentration required for sitting up, picking up a cup without spilling the contents, finding how to get clothes on, and reading the mail.

I lie flat, I close my eyes, I sidestep the pain, I meditate into a state of just being, head towards restfulness and BAM, there's the entire layout, complete with dialogue, for a new comic strip. Try again and THWACK there's the missing scene from the dance with explosions on the hillside. Empty thoughts again and YES there's the missing story arc for the current manuscript. And now I can hear the characters' voices arguing properly in the radio play script.

I know that ignoring this wilfully helpful act of my subconscious by going to sleep won't be the end of the world, whereas giving in, sitting up and working all night will quite likely mean the end of this week's already limited mobile hours. But perhaps if I just reached for my pen (I can write in the dark without sitting up) to make just a few notes. But there are huge scenes appearing in my head, I'll never remember them tomorrow if I let them go now...

In the end I couldn't write enough in any position last night. There was no cable to plug in to my skull to simply download the information, I couldn't stop the new ideas flowing in to the gaps as I made them, and despite continually shaking clean the mental etch-a-sketch, I couldn't get to sleep until 7am.

Slightly related to this reminder that being fuelled by ideas is not all it's cracked up to be, here is another ponder. I remember an oddly uncomfortable moment during a visit from someone last year, from someone who likes me and the things I write/ draw, but who I know harbours a flicker of resentment towards what is to them a very unfair allocation of creativity. Maybe resentment is too strong a word, maybe it is just a case of mild indignation.

Now, I'm allowed to say I'm fortunate that two of my passions have been of the sort that I can continue as proto careers no matter how ill, injured or isolated I get. Being productive whenever possible helps get me through the rest of the horrors, and helps me to live with it. Anyone else pointing out how very fortunate I am and that I should be more grateful for this, especially if they're someone who has never had so much as a week's illness in their life and is having this conversation with me just back from another work-funded trip to Europe, and en route to a good weekend's mountaineering with their pals as per, will get A Look. Perhaps they should realise their own good fortune first, and be more grateful that they don't also get A Smack.

2011-03-22T13:44:00.001+01:00

http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/culturelab/2011/03/data-of-lifes-rhythms-of-life-replayed-in-art.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/nstv/2011/03/dive-into-the-heart-of-a-monster-hurricane.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

Portobello beach

2011-03-21T18:58:00.011+01:00

I am crunchy. Yeah, I know I always crunch when I move, don't mock the afflicted by offering me WD40. Today I crunch due to being a crispy-coated beachmo. I spent the whole afternoon lying down not on my bed but on the beach, in the sunshine, with my toes in the water. Yes that's right, today's high tide was so high that even I could reach the sea to have a paddle.

The whole world changes when you're down there at the water's edge, all land behind you, sight at water level. Nothing exists but the rhythm of the waves.

Thinking of others, I felt very fortunate that this was as high as the sea would rise here.

The sunblock and golden sand have been redistributed and baked on to formed a defiantly sandy shell around my skull, shoulders, hands and feet. It's something a New Town spa could charge £150 for if sold as an exfoliating, circulation enhancing and rejuvination wrap. I'm not sure about the last aspect but by heck I got the first two.

The other wonderful thing about Portobello beach is that the place is hooching with creatives. I watched the megamoon rise with the filmaker Graham Kitchener, and today I found the photographer Max Blinkhorn at work (see proof above). I've come home with rekindled enthusiasm and focus for the various beach and sea-based projects in my notebooks.

Alas, due to my enthusiasms being housed in an ill and injured body (albeit a nicely exfoliated one), there will be no continuing anything arty or literary tonight. It's only been a couple of days since I could tolerate light at all, so that much wraparound sunshine may have been a shock to the eyeballs. Therefore, first I have to recover from the outing. Then I have to admit that the wheely trail of sand and dried seaweed through my hoose is, for once, entirely my fault, and could somebody else sweep it up please...

I'm going to get a beach access pathway down to the sea even if I have to make it out of tram rails.

access to creativity: artistic unblockers contd

2011-03-17T01:51:00.006+01:00

The battle between winter and spring continues; yesterday with sleet and today with thick sea fog. But spring is due. It's time to discard the winter angst, dissolve those cold-weather creative blockages, liberate yourself from performance (arts) anxiety and free your imagination!

In the absence of a script pad and the current MIMS, I prescribe to you this week's innovations in the overlapping fields of art, technology and science, in the hope that it will trigger a bout of mass inspiration. This may involve a lot of clicking on links:

The first is from a community art savvy student here in Edinburgh. Pom Pom Project: http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/news/Art-student-causes--a.6734924.jp

light painting with wifi reception in towns: http://yourban.no/2011/02/22/immaterials-light-painting-wifi/

3D movies of living cells: http://www.gizmag.com/3d-microscope-movies-living-cells/18138/

the (probably very familiar) fire-breathing scrap metal dragon: http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/culturelab/2011/03/meet-the-fire-breathing-scrap-metal-dragon.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

video games can so be art; the rebuff: http://www.gamesetwatch.com/2011/03/opinion_brian_moriartys_apolog.php

Unfortunately this is a Facebook link for now, but the photos of the finalists' work is worth a look. From the V&A - The Contemporary Middle Eastern Art and Design Jameel Prize 2011: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?fbid=10150119700028880&id=13987918879&aid=284563

architectural engineering can also be beautiful: http://www.quadror.com/

3D records of cave paintings: http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/culturelab/2011/03/ancient-paintings-unlocked-from-history.html

This is a particularly poignant study for me becasue I have watched the destruction of several sections of the pictish cave paintings in Wemyss, as the storm protection failed to be installed winter after winter, until all that was left of one of the caves was the photographs.

The meaning of dreaming - studies continue: http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/nstv/2011/03/explained-the-meaning-of-dreaming.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

I have mentioned before that I dream lucidly and vividly every night (and during the day) so consider myself to be potentially useful to these studies. When we get a national sleep research centre that can afford to study more than sleep apnoea, that is... Seriously though, I'd happily be a long-term gineau pig for dream research even if my personal outcome was neither useful to my quality of sleep or to a PhD.

On that note, I'd better face tonight's footage willingly and at least try to go to sleep. Sweet dreams to you, and a better day tomorrow for those who need it to improve on today's experience. Which is probably quite a large percentage of the planet. See, dreams are valuable.

Update: If you can't sleep tonight, try watching this: http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/nstv/2011/03/beware-its-raining-creepy-crawlies.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

Weaponizer

2011-03-15T22:09:00.006+01:00

Look! I've been published in Weaponizer:
http://www.weaponizer.co.uk/onearticle.php?category=flashfic&articleid=230

And I got an email from a short story competition body, acknowledging receipt of my story. I think that was jolly considerate of them, especially thinking how many competitions won't confirm receipt, even of email entries.

Due to the too-long Journey of Endless Shoogles home (that settles it; I'm moving back into town ASAP. Watch me pack), today is threatening to end abruptly in a migraine (and therefore adding an extra delay before I risk trying another taxi journey). Nevertheless, it's been a really lovely week for reconnecting with some old friends, meeting new people, stumbling across new opportunities and feeling creatively active, liberated, earthed and wired, all in one big inky equation. I even feel part of Beltane already, and it's only March, I think.

Of course, I am also thinking about how I can help with fundraising for the terrible events I've been following in the news.

Well, swiftly checking the calender it is indeed March. Which means that I'm going to be 'appearing' in the Forest next Wednesday (23rd), at Golden Hour. Featuring writer-performers (cough, me!), poets, musicians, animation and Ryan van Winkle himself, the show starts at 8pm, it's free, the vegetarian cafe will be open if you're peckish, and it is BYOB with very reasonable corkage.

The Forest Cafe is on Forrest Road. Access-wise there's a ramp into the building and a ground-floor disabled loo, but arrive fairly early if you want to grab a comfy corner before the enthusiastic hordes arrive. After the main show, there will be music and schmoozing from about 10pm until closing.

Happy Pi Day

2011-03-14T21:44:00.004+01:00

In case you haven't already celebrated the day of Pi accordingly, there is still time. If you start baking now, you can have one ready in time for supper. While your Pi is baking, we can indulge in some appropriate entertainment:

The Hairy Bikers http://www.hairybikers.com/index.php?hairy_bakers_2

Pies and Pasties by the Hairy Bakers, broadcast on 06/2008

The Hairy Bikers take their longest trip in this baking series, from Cornwall to Scotland.
Dave and Si start in the far South West cooking traditional pasties at Geevor Tin Mine in Cornwall. Once made, the pasties - and the boys - face the ultimate test: the locals. Will the pasties be good enough to impress?

They then head northwards to the Midlands and visit an orchard in Abberley, Worcestershire to produce an apple pie. From there, it's on to Melton Mowbray, where they try their hand at making pork pies.

Heading North, the boys' journey takes a detour via Dave's house where they rustle up two of their favourite pies. For Si, it's a chicken and wild mushroom, while Dave opts for a more humble cheese and onion pie.

Finally, it's on to Huntly in Aberdeenshire, where our hungry hairy bikers sample an extraordinary range of pies - Scotch pie, macaroni pie, and mashed potato and baked bean pie.

Their journey ends on the banks of the River Deveron. There, they cook a salmon coulibiac - a whole fish stuffed with prawns wrapped in filo pastry - and feed it to pipers and highland dancers.

Or read this: The Life of Pi by Yann Martel http://www.lifeofpi.co.uk/

Or you could just eat pies until bedtime.

In case you're not familiar with Pi Day, let wikipidia inspire you to investigate (because as you know, wikipidia is not the actual answer) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pi_Day Beards, sandals and corderoys are not essential ingredients of Pi Day. The tendency to note dates in the American manner as opposed to the correct manner, probably is ;-)

Pi photo from wikipedia

Tides of March

2011-03-10T17:24:00.012+01:00

This blog always ends up on the beach. Which is more than its writer does.

This month features a full moon at its largest size in two decades, rising on Saturday 19th at 18:20. This is followed by an unusually low tide at 21:15 on Sunday 20th and a very high tide on Monday 21st at 15:35. If the weather is clement, this will be a weekend best spent on the East coast beaches, watching and exploring. If anyone finds areas with new beach pathways or accessible bits of sea, please let me know so I can share the good news. In the meantime, I'll be finding out how deep wheels sink into sand.

Tide Tables for the rest of March
(predictions for Leith docks and nearby beaches of Cramond and Portobello)

Fri 11th 06:13 4.73m H 11:07 1.58m L 18:31 4.73m H 23:24 1.73m L
Sat 12th 06:57 4.53m H 11:48 1.85m L 19:21 4.51m H
Sun 13th 00:11 2.06m L 07:51 4.33m H 13:07 2.13m L 20:25 4.33m H
Mon 14th 01:58 2.37m L 09:02 4.23m H 15:20 2.16m L 21:46 4.30m H
Tue 15th 04:12 2.31m L 10:24 4.33m H 17:00 1.85m L 23:10 4.53m H
Wed 16th 05:33 1.96m L 11:41 4.65m H 18:03 1.39m L
Thu 17th 00:18 4.91m H 06:27 1.54m L 12:39 5.06m H 18:56 0.93m L
Fri 18th 01:09 5.30m H 07:12 1.13m L 13:26 5.47m H 19:44 0.50m L
Sat 19th 01:52 5.63m H 07:57 0.74m L 14:09 5.81m H 20:30 0.17m L
Sun 20th 02:33 5.84m H 08:42 0.46m L 14:51 6.04m H 21:15 -0.00m L
Mon 21st 03:15 5.92m H 09:26 0.31m L 15:35 6.12m H 21:58 0.04m L
Tue 22nd 03:58 5.86m H 10:09 0.35m L 16:21 6.03m H 22:39 0.30m L
Wed 23rd 04:42 5.67m H 10:48 0.56m L 17:09 5.79m H 23:17 0.73m L
Thu 24th 05:29 5.39m H 11:27 0.89m L 18:00 5.42m H 23:52 1.24m L
Fri 25th 06:18 5.06m H 12:06 1.29m L 18:57 5.00m H
Sat 26th 00:30 1.75m L 07:15 4.72m H 13:03 1.70m L 20:04 4.62m H
Sun 27th 01:31 2.19m L 08:23 4.45m H 14:54 1.97m L 21:19 4.39m H
Mon 28th 03:28 2.39m L 09:39 4.34m H 16:42 1.88m L 22:42 4.37m H
Tue 29th 05:00 2.26m L 11:01 4.42m H 17:49 1.66m L 23:56 4.54m H
Wed 30th 05:56 2.00m L 12:10 4.64m H 18:39 1.45m L
Thu 31st 00:48 4.77m H 06:36 1.72m L 13:00 4.87m H 19:15 1.27m L

happy international women's pancake day

2011-03-08T10:23:00.004+01:00

International women's pancake day

For this recipe you will need:

freedom
education
contraception
employment
responsibility

Add generous quantities of each, mix gently then leave still, without stirring, until able to stand up alone.

Take some of the following ingredient and put aside until needed. Don't spill any; it's very hard to replace:

appropriate repercussions for criminal or extreme gender bias (of either kind) in the home, in the street, in the workplace, in schools, in healthcare, in politics, in law.

then

Chop and shred these ingredients:

inappropriate religious doctrine
uncontrollable pregnancies
unequal pay
courtroom bias
ageism
genital mutilation
enforced gender stereotypes and expectations

Discard them; compost them or feed to the pigs.

then

Lay out a really large plate for yourself. If you can't do gluten or dairy, look away now:

Heat a heavy-bottomed frying pan and grease it lightly.

Sieve and mix the flour, eggs, milk and water then add a big pinch of salt.

Pour a small quantity of the pancake mixture into the pan and tip until it has spread thinly.

Fry the pancake until golden, slide it onto a plate, add lemon juice and sugar or maple syrup. Or anything you want to add. In fact, do whatever you want to do with the pancake.

Scoff.

A Lyrical Death Match: Cargo vs Chemikal

2011-02-27T18:49:00.002+01:00

TONIGHT!

A Lyrical Death Match: Cargo vs Chemikal

The Caves
Niddrie Street
Old Town
Tickets on door
6pm - 9pm

Two of Scotland’s hottest cultural nests - Cargo publishing and music label Chemikal Underground – come head to head armed with prose, poetry and song. Author Alan Bissett, Rodge Glass and Doug Johnstone, poet Ryan Van Winkle and emerging talent Kirstin Innes get up on stage to face former-The Delgados and revered singer songwriter Emma Pollock, and the multi-talented Lord Cutglass and his band. Stand-up comedian AL Kennedy referees the evening. Expect great music, and great writing at a great venue.

mapping the city

2011-02-19T17:05:00.008+01:00

Time to update the city mapping - without the actual map for now...

Using Grassmarket as a hub for wheely exploration, you can head up either side of Victoria Street (1) up to George VI Bridge, or take the left hand side of West Port (2) out of the Grassmarket to Lady Lawson Street and on to Tollcross; or leave by Kings Stables Road (3) heading to Lothian Road or Princes Street. There are no lowered pavement edges onto Candlemaker Row or through The Cowgate or up the right hand side of West Port.

In the Grassmarket itself, The Beehive Inn has smooth access to the restaurant, ground floor bar and disabled loos. Next door, The Lot was an accessible arts venue with restaurant, but sadly it closed last month. Keep an eye on the venue for whoever takes it over.

Right then, heading out of the Grassmarket...

route 1) up Victoria Street. Very steep, but smooth enough. George VI Bridge has several pedestrian crossings with lowered edges on both sides of the road. You can nip between the National Library of Scotland (with cafe) and Central Library (with window art gallery run by ECA students). However, cars can park across any of these crossings except the ones with traffic lights at the top of the street where George IV Bridge intersects with the Royal Mile. The crossings onto and next to the Royal Mile have very steep ramps onto the road, but at least there's a wee green man to stop traffic.

That same style of pavement edge ramp is used across Chambers Street, with the added bonus of not being completely lowered, so the sudden drop onto the road will wake you up en route to the (free) National Museum of Scotland. Note that the wonderfully accessible museum roof garden will be closed for maintenance for the next six months, but the new museum itself is still open. The old part of the museum, under renovation for the past three years, will re-open to the public on 29th July.

Just round the corner from the museum on Forrest Road is the Forest Cafe, with ramp access, cafe, performance stage, bookshop, hairdressers, massage therapist, art gallery and disabled loo all on the ground floor. This is another arts venue under threat: http://www.guardian.co.uk/edinburgh/2011/feb/18/edinburgh-forest-cafe-campaign-update-harry-giles

Back on George IV Bridge, across the road from the Forest Cafe, guarded by a statue of Greyfriar's Bobby (a dead dog), is Greyfriar's Kirk. There's a smooth path round the historic kirkyard, and a cobbled one if you fancy that instead. The road in and out is pretty steep, so you'll exit the area faster than you arrived.

If you have very wee wheels, you won't be able to cross directly from Forrest Road to Bristo Square as the pavement edges at those crossings haven't been lowered much. Get to the Greyfriars side and head along that side of the road to the Uni buildings, library and Reid Hall, or to have a picnic on the verdant expanse of The Meadows beyond. The Meadows Festival is in June, btw. The crossings in and out of the Meadows are lowered and have lights. Don't go anywhere near badly cobbled Buccleuch Place unless you fancy juggling with your kidneys. The main advice for wheels is to try to stick to cycle path rules when trundling round the Meadows pathways, and watch out for jugglers.

Up at the other end of George IV Bridge, you can cross the Royal Mile then speed down the very steep Mound to the (free) National Galleries of Scotland, both of which have ramp access, lifts and disabled loos. Good luck getting back up The Mound afterwards. If you only get half way up, you can coast down Market Street to the (free) Fruitmarket Gallery, which is next to Waverly Station. There is a taxi rank in the station, just in case you need one to get back to the Grassmarket after all that.

route 2) The Art Roche backpacker hostel on the corner of Grassmarket and West Port has a lift to all floors, all the cheap shared rooms are accessible, and there's a private en-suite disabled room if neccesary. Note that the latter is more expensive than an ordinary hotel room, so the Grassmarket Hotel across the square would be a better bargain. The Grassmarket Hotel building is at least a couple of hundred years old but it too has a lift and wifi. If price is irrelevant then try the new Apex International Hotel across the square. Onwards and up West Port, you can visit the art college's new building Evolution House (lifts and accessible loos) or go round the Corner of Doom to the older art college buildings, also with full lift access and loos.

On the far side of the Pubic Triangle, something strange happens to the pavements in Tollcross. You can see Bread Street, but not actually get onto it. To find a lowered pavement edge you'll need to go round via Lothian Road. This will be the route to the canal (with an accessible wheelie canal boat for trips to Ratho and back) in a future guide.

route 3) round the base of Castle Rock, under the (19th tunnel-arched bridge carrying Johnstone Terrace over your head. The tunnel extrance is flanked by massive obelisks, green from the damp. Past the saxophonists and out the other side, you'll have the multi storey car park on your left and Princes Street Gardens on your right. Unless you're wearing a jet pack, this will have to also be your exit from the gardens when you've finished with the trees, fountain, monuments, stealth squirrels and random entertainment, as the paths up to Princes Street on the far side of the gardens are awesomely steep.

St Cuthbert's and St John's at the west end of the gardens provide beautiful old gravestones for a spot of photography, family tree-ing or serene reflection, etc. Both church cafes are open throughout the summer, along with craft fairs and the odd performer.

There is no access to the castle from the gardens, for that you'll need to get onto the Royal Mile. Wheelchair users get a partner in free, thanks to Historic Scotland's assistance deal.

Where King's Stables Road meets Lothian Road, the traffic becomes feisty. This pedestrian crossing has double RED lines at the lights. I think that means you can be shot for parking there. No green man button on this side but the lights will change. Crossing Johnstone Terrace to get onto the pavement on the left hand side of Lothian Road, you'll find lowered pavement edges on either side of the traffic island - but then you'll be faced with a high pavement edge that mysteriously has no matching lowered edge on the far side. I had about ten seconds to reverse to safety before the lights change and the traffic started up again. This crossing should get an immediate response from the council works, so keep your yer on it and keep poking them if nothing changes, and in the meantime use the right hand side of Lothian Road to get to the Filmhouse then the crossing outside it to get to the Lyceum. From there it's just a short downhill trundle back into the Grassmarket.

bad apples in the taxi driver barrel

2011-02-14T22:49:00.004+01:00

This is too much, it's beyond a co-incidence now.

I ordered my taxi (from a different company this time just to be sure) at 7.10pm. I sat out in full view. At 7.40pm the controller explained that the taxi driver had reported that he'd collected me and delivered me, and the booking was now cleared.

I explained, as much as was possible with chattering teeth, that nobody had collected me. There had been no taxis at all, I was in full view, and even if there was another street in the city with that name it was slightly unlikely that the driver had found a woman on her own in a wheelchair who had wanted to go to the booked destination. The driver had lied, to get out of collecting a wheelchair fare without having to officially turn it down. He'd deliberately abandoned someone in a wheelchair, in the dark, in sub-zero temperatures.

The replacement taxi collected me at 8.15pm. I'd been sitting outside for over an hour.

I can't begin to describe how much pain I'm in from so long sitting in that temperature. I can't describe my morale either, because the levels have sunk below anything I can find.

update from the round-the-world cyclist

2011-02-13T23:55:00.006+01:00

To balance the last travel post - and to update those of you who aren't already reading Pauline Symaniak's account in her own blog - I thought I'd bring you the latest chapter of a happy cycling tale from this far-away freerange Edinburger who left Portobello last summer to cycle round the world:

Saturday, 12 February 2011
San Juan, Argentina - Pleasant surprises

I wasn't really looking forward to the cycle from San Martin to San Juan. To avoid a busy stretch of Ruta 40 I was doing a dog-leg to the east across several empty inches on the map with no campsites for a few days ... in fact, with not very much at all for a few days. However, as is often the case in Argentina, there were pleasant surprises.

At lunchtime on the first day I pulled off the highway into the village of Asuncion, hoping there might be a spot where I could get permission to camp. It was a poor village, the poorest I´ve seen in a country I´ve come to think of as "European". A true desert town, there was only sand and bare soil, scoured by a wind that sent dust devils across the plaza. I´d arrived at the start of siesta and the deserted streets added to the gloominess. I settled myself down in a patch of shade to sit out the the heat of the afternoon. I was just thinking to myself "this is grim" when I spotted a tent between a gap in the houses. Investigations revealed a group of young Americans who were camping in the village while doing voluntary work in the area. My tent was added to the colourful little village of tents and there was even an unexpected shower and dinner invitation! Then of course, after siesta, the village came to life - women watered front yards with buckets of water to keep the dust down, kids flew up and down on bicycles and threw stones at chickens, and a trailer-load of grubby menfolk was deposited on the corner, presumably having come from working in the vineyards to the south.

The next dot on the map was Encon, an unattractive cluster of buildings around a road junction in the desert. At least I knew there was a service station here for camping, although when I got there it wasn´t the most appealing of service station stops. With a long afternoon ahead of sitting out the heat and waiting to pitch the tent, I decided to treat myself to lunch out at a wee "comedor" in the village. I had steak, eggs, salad, a cold drink and a coffee for less than six pounds. As I was leaving, the senora asked me where I was staying and when I said at the service station, she led me around to the back of the restaurant. Here was a little oasis - a lush lawn surrounded by a carefully-tended flower border that was alive with butterflies and shaded by tall trees. Noisy wild parrots flitted back and forth, watched over by the equally noisy pet parrot. His Spanish vocabulary was about as extensive as mine - "hola" and not much more. His English was excellent though! The senora´s house was above the restaurant and a smallholding extended beyond the garden - she invited me along when she went to feed the cattle, pigs and chickens. If they were the source of my lunch, then I can record very low food miles! My tent was pitched in the middle of the lawn and I pottered away a very enjoyable afternoon.

San Juan is another pleasant surprise - a modern city of tree-lined streets. Although there is a sad story behind this. The city was largely destroyed in the middle of last century by an earthquake so what we see today is the result of the modern rebuilding. It´s a wealthy city -the surrounding vineyards have generated the money here which is such that there are even shops where you can buy outfits for dogs!

One advantage of swinging out on a more easterly route is the incredible perspective it´s given me of the Andes, as a result of "standing back" a little. I´m cycling on a 600m high plain. At its western edge the mountains are a sudden uprising of snow-covered rock, snaking away to the south and to the north as far as the eye can see. These are big guys now of five and six thousand metres but yesterday morning the rising sun picked out in pink one peak that rose above the others. At 6959m it´s the highest mountain in South America - Aconcagua.

I´m pretty excited about the road north of San Jan which turns back into the mountains. I´ve picked up a lot of information from other cyclists such as locations of campsites and service stations, the most scenic routes, places to get shade and water and, most critically, where the coffee stops are! But I´m hoping there´ll also be more pleasant little surpises.

Posted by Pauline at 07:49 in http://symaniak.blogspot.com/2011/02/san-juan-argentina-pleasant-surprises.html

road to nowhere

2011-02-12T18:41:00.005+01:00

Felt able to travel in a vehicle again today. Think it's been about two weeks this time. I ordered a cab with plenty of time to spare, determined to make the meeting on time and have time to grab a sandwich before the next one.

Taxi didn't turn up. I called them when I realised they were now twenty mins late. They did the audio equivalent of shrugging. I asked if it would be with me soon as I was now scootered in the road where their ramp would work. But there's no taxi near you they said.

Duh!

The replacement they sent didn't arrive. I was now frozen to the bones, slightly rained on, but feeling more angry than miserable. If I'd known that there would follow another hour and a half with two, no, wait I'd forgotten one, THREE taxis refusing to take me but not stopping or saying so, just shaking their head and speeding up, I might have gone back to bed. But I had to get back into town and no-one could give me a lift as the scooter needs a black cab or a van. I suddenly felt completely and utterly vunerable and hopelessly stranded. Fortunately that soon turned to raging fury.

Taxi number seven got me into town, almost two hours late. He was cheery and helpful, so I risked meeting the humans at the after-lunch venue. Unfortunately when the lecturer arrived, she greeted those standing, then they all ran off down the stairs together, leaving me sitting there like a piece of furniture, with no idea of the destination or the route I was supposed to take. If two girls hadn't stopped, stayed with me, helped ask a member of staff where they others gone, then chum me along, I'd have left the building there and then. Well, some days there isn't enough deep breathing in me to sustain serenity.

It's particularly a shame as the night before was really good, being well enough for company and fresh air after another day flat out in the dark. There was more optimism for getting out to the island too. I think it might even be possible to record 'Island of Doom' ON the island itself, maybe, maybe! And did I mention the good food? I can still taste the garlic, yum.

Train travel

2011-02-08T20:42:00.004+01:00

This is the new investigation, as part of my travel-round-Scotland fantasy. I'm not in a state to go out testing just yet, but for once this task is probably safer done from bed!

The last time I used a train I discovered four things about wheely train travel.

1) Trains use split ramps, like the old black cabs, which can't be used by mobility scooters.

2) The ramps are stored at each station not in the train, so if the forewarned station isn't ready, you're stuck on the train.

3) There was a hint of a suggestion that mobility scooters wouldn't be welcome on trains even if they could get on as they are not always used by people who are genuinely wheelchair users and therefore shouldn't get priority parking on board. It would take a couple of years to get to the top of the list for a powered wheelchair, and I can't afford to just buy one, hence the second-hand Scooter of Freedom.

4) My local station has a wheelchair access ramp up to the station. It is, however, so long and so steep that nobody can push my wheelchair up it in one go and some can't do it at all.

I would assume that there is a wheely user guide to Scottish railway stations but experience is teaching me to avoid such assumptions :-) I'm going to start with Edinburgh Waverly and work my way along a theoretical route to get as far North as I'd need to in order to find a beach that has paths to the water, dolphins and the Northern Lights. I realise this may involve continuing on to Finland...

2011-02-05T16:46:00.003+01:00

I can't travel in a vehicle at the moment, or rather I can't travel any further than about a metre in a vehicle. This meant I couldn't attend yesterday's funeral for a talented friend who died tragically young. I'd like to plant flowers for her, will do that soon.

There's only a fortnight now until a memorial day for someone else, someone who still feels utterly irreplaceable in my life, so I am making plans for that day now. She didn't get a proper funeral as her husband overrode all of her requests and plans, so grieving is filled with outrage too, which isn't healthy. You have to wonder how often that happens, especially with people who were ill or disabled or badly married, to the extent of being not independant or in charge.

With the restrictions on travelling in vehicles, I discovered the extent of the distance I can scooter. Today I made it to the Top Secret Boatshed and back, but may pay for that amount of shoogling for several days. I don't know who decided pavements should consist of small slabs, but every last gap between them all is now written across my joints!

Skiff Flipping

2011-02-05T16:15:00.011+01:00

Today marked another momentous event for the Porty Skiffers - flipover day! After a winter of working on the upside-down clinker-built hull, the keel had been added, everything planed and sanded, and it was time for Nik to lead us in turning it right side up. The excitment was tangible as the boat shed filled with rowers, boat shed workers and random family members. It took less than a minute to flip the hull and reposition it on the stands, then there it was, looking like a boat. Looking like a very fragile little boat with no innards! I have to say, if it was all mine and in my shed I'd be sleeping in it from now on as it is a beautiful thing. I can see the bits I worked on, which is a strange feeling.

We posed for photos taken by Max Blinkhorn, and were filmed by Osbert Lancaster (evidence to follow soon) though obviously the star was the new skiff. As is only fitting, the shed then slowly emptied as Andres led folk back to the beach to take Icebreaker out for an over 55s session in the last of the day's light. The other teams had been out from 8am until noon. The sea was a bit lumpy but not choppy like yesterday.

No matter what the weather or temperature has done this winter, not a week has gone past without a training session out on the sea. I've already mentioned that Porty is full of artists, musicians and writers (usually on the beach looking for time away from the keyboard/ easel). Porty also has a very hardy bunch of urban skiffers.

Btw, the Portobello Regatta will be taking place on the last weekend in July and it's gonna be hooooge.

boatshed photograph by Max Blinkhorn

literacy

2011-02-03T22:19:00.006+01:00

I can thanks A L Kennedy for today's post:

"The arts aren't about self-indulgence, they're about being fully and visibly alive."

quote from http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/booksblog/2011/feb/03/arts-funding

Admittedly there is going to be indulgence in there for some, but for everyone else, being able to express oneself, create, interact and participate in some arts should be a basic building block of personal development, never mind a way to really exist. For me, reading, writing and drawing keeps me alive. That's not an exaggeration. Drugs can only do so much to keep you sane and determined when stuck in bed. I can look at books containing stories I wrote, photos of paintings I've had in exhibitions (that I didn't ever attend) and at my sketchbooks working out paintings I'm about to do, and it reminds me that I have achieved things, taken part in things in absentia, have things to look forward to that I will be able to manage, and that part of me is alive even if the rest of me takes time off. People know I exist, even if they've never met me. I haven't been able to do anything except sit up in bed from time to time these past couple of days, so I've communicated by email and listened to audio books, books that other people wrote.

Which leads me to a programme that should not be named, that I was talking about with someone earlier today, where the enforced illiteracy of the female members of a community in the UK was justified by the men (and some of the women) as 'tradition', therefore any attempts to investigate it as abuse was labelled 'racism', which is a word that will always make people back off. Obviously their cars, mobiles, laptops and flat screen TVs were traditional ones, are you doubting their ethos there? Racist!

If those girls and women could read and write properly, they might be able to learn, to think of new things, to imagine, to communicate with people ouside their community, to make changes, and to escape, even if it was simply into books at the end of each day. Books borrowed from nearby libraries as females don't usually have cash of their own. Oh wait, there may be a flaw in that proposal...

So tomorrow (Saturday 5th Feb) is National Save Our Libraries Day. Go along to your local library to show support (and maybe even borrow a book or two)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2011/feb/02/scottish-parliament-save-our-libraries-day

2011-02-02T01:06:00.005+01:00

Ok, you caught me. My blogging petered out because I felt increasingly self-conscious that I'd stopped reviewing events and was instead more or less reviewing random day to day life snippets on wheels/ bedlegs/ from the depths of the fridge. While not really being able to mention new art or writing projects etc. While trying to avoid talking about being in pain or ill n stuff. Now I feel bad for being crap. Oy vey.

When I think of how having access to the internet, having online contact with people and having a voice of sorts would have transformed my life - given me a life - for the time I was stuck in bed in a house in the middle of nowhere with no computer and no home-visiting GP or nurse, well, it's best not to dwell on that. Best not to think about it at all. That sort of non-consensual isolation should never, ever be allowed.

Well, I don't have any excuse for online absence now. I will at least continue the venue access reviewing now that I have a new wee shiny notebook (thanks Charlie). It does still feel strange though, sometimes. It's not so long ago that I never got out and feared I never would again. Even now, it's part of the normal routine of life to be in bed for several days at a time and indoors several weeks at a time. This can make a person a little hesitant in becoming too cocky about making plans to explore their surroundings.

To redeem myself, I'll add some things I have succeeded in exploring in town recently:

Tonight's first recommendation is to check out the menu for What's On at the now very accessible National Library of Scotland on George IV Bridge. Not only are the free events varied and weekly, and the other attendees friendly, but after 3pm all sandwiches in the library cafe are half price :-)

Edinburgh College of Art, Lauriston Place, launches another menu this week: Summer School. All departments are accessible except Photography. Printmaking is difficult due to the problems manoevering round the workshops while there are several others working the presses, but don't let that stop you calling the CCS office for a chat about the possibilities. There are also some excellent classes just for kids. No cut-price butties here, but you may find yourself working alongside degree students who're taking extra classes, and you'll get to exhibit your work in the college at the end of each week.

The Forest, (long may it last) on Forrest Road, now has the Inky Fingers spoken word performance night as well as the infamous Golden Hour. If you haven't fully explored the ground floor, you need to go right through the cafe and out the other side to discover Sip n Snip and The Massage Corner, two fabulous jewels in the Forest crown. That extra massage gave me a whole lease of life one afternoon. I was almost tempted to get my hair trimmed too.

The Caves, Niddrie Street, have an accessible ground floor level. Now I have discovered that if you have concerns about queueing to get in etc, you can contact the venue beforehand and the nicest security chaps (I don't know what they're called nowadays but they used to be bouncers) will look out for you as you shoogle across the cobbles towards the venue, then speed you indoors.

Another change for the rest of the venues on my to visit list is that while venues with one step are wheelchair accessible, they're not accessible to a mobility scooter. For those who haven't driven one of those dodgy wee feckers, let me explain that they can get jammed on a shadow, so they need a completely smooth doorway. Understandably those are rare in a hilly, cobbly city, but not as rare as you might fear.

However, tonight we pin the tail on some donkeys too: the drivers who park their cars across the lowered pavement edges at crossings along George IV Bridge. If I hadn't found myself stuck in the road unable to get onto the pavement or return to the accessible side, with traffic approaching as the lights changed, and therefore with other concerns, I'd now have an awesome collection of wing mirrors in my shed.

And before I forget - I've been mentioned! http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/ouch/2011/01/blogging_disabled_life.html

Valentine gig

2011-01-24T04:57:00.004+01:00

Love Sick: a bracing antidote to Valentine’s Day.

Writers’ Bloc’s Andrew C Ferguson, Andrew J Wilson and Morag Edward will be the guests of the talented Napier University Creative Writing folk, who will include Jennifer Bryce, Ever Dundas, Sian Bevan, Matthew Nadelhaft, Sean Martin, Ariadne Cass-Maran and Barbara Melville:

Hello, my pretties. Do you think Valentine’s Day is squishy (in a bad way)? Forget the evening of shoplifting you had planned. Instead, come join us on Sunday 13th February for a FREE night of anti-Valentine stories, including guest performances from spoken word group Writers’ Bloc. We kick off at 8pm, and promise tales of historical romance, sexual perversions, and… well, more sexual perversions. After that, you can stay around for a drink and some other ’stuff’. Don’t forget the safe word, darling.

“Love Sick” will be held in the Speakeasy at Cabaret Voltaire, 36-38 Blair Street, on Sunday 13th February from 8pm to 11:00 pm. And it’s free!

Wheelchair access is through the fire exit next to the stepped entrance so just ask security to let you in.

* Loveheart artwork available as prints and gift cards from Edinburgh art collective http://www.knockmysocksoff.co.uk/

Three Legged Horses

2011-01-08T21:41:00.015+01:00

Three Legged Horses need you!

There are only three days left until the fundraising deadline for Debasers Filums to secure the theme song from Rocky played in the pivotal scene of this Scottish short film - or it doesn't happen.

"Three-Legged Horses is a Scottish short film, currently in post production, about a rickshaw driver's last working night in Edinburgh.

We find our main character, a rickshaw driver, at the end of his run. After being told any more work will damage his knees permanently, he's now on a mission. He's got a target, one last weekend and he's going to make the best of it.

Unfortunately, as it goes, 'the best laid schemes o' mice an' men gang aft agley'. He soon finds himself on his worst night ever, with pain constantly shooting through his knees and neds (local scottish yoof!) trying to steal his comfy blanket and meager earnings.

As the night threatens to end with nothing to show for, he reluctantly agrees to take three less-than-friendly lads on his most gruelling ride yet, up to the Edinburgh Castle. It's an unrelenting pointless lift, and he struggles to keep going.

A local group of buskers comes to the rescue, providing him with the soundtrack (and the second wind) to redeem his night.

'Three-Legged Horses' is based on real events and happenings I witnessed or experienced during my years working as a rickshaw driver in Edinburgh and Dublin. The climactic scene is the best thing that's ever happened to me on a rickshaw and one of the best moments in my life. It has now become somewhat of a ritual for Edinburgh pedicabbers."

You can read interviews with the writer and peddling star Felipe Bustos Sierra here: http://www.reelscotland.com/?p=6975

and watch the trailer for the film here: http://www.guardian.co.uk/edinburgh/2011/jan/07/edinburgh-rickshaw-film-rocky-soundtrack

And then you might like to head for the fundraising page... http://www.sponsume.com/projects/three-legged-horses

I personally want this to succeed for (hastily counts) at least FOUR reasons:

1) It is a brilliant film, with a wonderful storyline - and it actually happened.

2) There are so many talented people involved in and related to this film; there's an awesome network of personal connections to other Edinburgh groups, performers, projects, bands and city history.

3) The Scottish film industry is just a baby. It needs your support to get these gems onto the big screen.

4) Karma. I think we all have big projects that will need team work sooner or later.

and not least

5) I froze my black-clad butt off in the ice and sleet and generally Arctic November night to contribute to the uphill crowd scene, along with everyone else. Do not let our collective hypothermia go to waste. Orkestra del Sol have only recently been defrosted!

C'mon, donate some spare change and get a gift for that special person who has everything else:
http://www.sponsume.com/projects/three-legged-horses

* * * *UPDATE and the total has been reached!

end of year blog

2010-12-29T16:19:00.017+01:00

This blog will be changing back into event and building review mode next year but here is one last flash of me talking about myself before the year ends. I need to go power nap before the hogmanay beach party now zzzz

2010 for velocity-m:

Inside? I am calmer, stronger, more likely to get to sleep without drugs and slightly more accepting of working within the limits of my condition and the consequences. I have buried the fury so deep that it'll come out through the soles of my feet as flames. It also leaks out in my dreams.

At least, I was ok on the serenity front until cabin fever collided with extended isolation from friends I used to see/ work with regularly at the Big Red Door, failure to get either novel to end properly, the realisation that for all the artwork done none of it was what I had planned to do so I had nothing for five big exhibition opportunities - again, hit head on with outrageous family behaviour and an unbearable need to dance, swim and fly. Right on the start of one of the toughest times of the year for rubbing my limitations in my face (second only to summertime) - the festive season.

Career(s)? Career-wise I got some exposure on the literary/ publishing and cabaret circuit but didn't get a foot in the door with the international publishing world. The city's literary salons are still being held upstairs so that precious but casual schmoozing still doesn't happen for me, three years on. But there was progress! I was one of the guest authors at the City of Literature's Story Shop at the Edinburgh International Book Festival and also appeared at one of the new EIBF Unbound cabaret nights, with the rest of the Writers' Bloc authors. The farewell cabaret of the Big Red Door and my friends' wedding reception cabaret out West were two other favourites. I was also one of the writers in a new event: 26 Treasures at the V&A, which made me feel very metropolitan even in absentia. To top that, I've started recording properly with a musician friend and the results are already awesome.

I only write because I can't use my creativity in art college or a studio or up a mountain or out at sea, but words don't fully scratch that itch, they really don't.

Challenges? Getting through every day and every night at this level of illness, and trying to do it without looking so ill or showing so much pain, which unfortunately causes unexpected problems in itself when folk think I'm fine, or just more fine than the folk who complain more loudly, but that's going to stay the way I do it for the sake of my pride. It's actually quite hard not to scream or punch or throw up in public sometimes, but you should not be able to guess that. Scarlet lipstick helps. A nurse told me that but I disregarded the advice for years because she'd also advised me to get a tan to make me look perky.

Firsts? Lots. A few to mention here include The Hat for Musselburgh, articles for The Guardian, Portobello Regatta, being filmed reading at the book festival and busking on the prom during sunsets. I fear that getting out to the island may have to wait for next year now but I finally have options and methods.

Any regrets? Yes. One enormous issue that could, unlike the insurmountable problems in life, be solved with just the odd text/ email/ call. It's strange but despite me knowing almost only hippy and outdoorsy people, I find it almost impossible to get invited on so much as a short car trip or get a shot on the back of a bike or even to get invited to a bbq or picnic, let alone be included in a festival or camping trip. I think I have been ill so long and absent so frequently, that I've become invisible even when I'm right there, or maybe significantly it's my outdoors identity that's gone. I'm not kidding. It leaves me feeling as though ME or arthritis are related to leprosy. Is it the awkwardness of the wheels, suspicion that I/ they wouldn't be able to manage out and about? I have definitely lost my belonging with outdoors people. Bring it back.

Hatches, matches and dispatches? I made it to only one of the three splendid weddings on my calender but there is footage to prove it. There were no births or deaths in the family, but some happened close by. There were also noticeable births and deaths of friendships, which is quite unusual.

2011? Mainly the outdoors stuff, see above... I have several other challenges lined up for January, which is not like me at all as I prefer to think of things to get finished in December rather than thinking of things to start in January. But I'm not going to mention them here.

music:
the prodigy vs white stripes: blue voodoo people DJ Zebra
weird attractors: adrenaline soup

2010-12-25T01:55:00.002+01:00

and a Merry Midwintery Festive Tinsely stuff to you all :-)

~ hands out kisses, hugs, roast potatoes, gin~

slainte!

son et lumiere

2010-12-16T23:25:00.005+01:00

Had the strange but inspiring experience of recording two of my stories last night. What a time to have an irrideemably dry mouth. Do you know how many sounds your mouth makes other than forming your accent's version of the alphabet when faced with a very sensitive microphone and a silent room? I do now. And as for all the breathing I do, well, tsk.

I'm intrigued to see what T does with the tracks. He has excellent gadgets and is dauntingly creative. I don't mind re-recording fluffed words or sections to polish it, but I will resist getting too picky, honestly. After all, I can't be trusted not to change the, er, software thingie, to do a helium voice for laugh (not my fault, I've already heard the Dr Who version of me) but more relevantly I don't think anyone can be competely professionally remote about the way their own voice sounds to them. I was genuinely surprised to hear that I don't speak too fast and am not all slurred. Inside my head I'm verging on incoherent. I am happiest just not talking, but indoors I tend to ramble. Who'd have thought cabin fever/ claustrophobia/ I hate ceilings affected the gob.

My first ever experience of public speaking was when I was little. I was chosen for having a 'nice voice' and being unlikely to swear (in English anyway) but no-one anticipated what would happen to my pace when placed anywhere near a microphone. I've got a recording of one of those ancient onstage speaking experiences and I sound like an eight year old on speed. 'Nice voice' aye, maybe, but only if you recorded me and slowed it down to walking pace. In retrospect I am not impressed that the grown-up response was not to teach me to BREATHE, or at least pause at punctuation marks, but instead to just tell me I talked to fast when near a mic to be understood, so that was that for me and mics. That approach to child development might be a Calvanist thing.

Trouble is, being let loose on a musician/ sound engineer has me raking through my short stories/ performance pieces just boggling at what I could do with words now. It was already happening yesterday, which is possibly why I kept getting ideas instead of sleep all the way to the sleet storm at 5am. Of course, given the angle of the boggle, all the words had music inside them.

ME/CFS research

2010-12-10T01:17:00.002+01:00

(with thanks to the editorial team of the edmesh newsletter)

Researchers from the University of Dundee have received funding for a clinical trial of vitamin D in people with ME/CFS. Their primary aim is to see whether giving oral vitamin D supplementation improves the function of blood vessels, notably the stiffness of the arteries.

The study is about to begin so aims to recruit fifty people with ME/CFS from around Scotland. Participants will be asked to come to the unit in Dundee on five occasions for a variety of non-invasive tests at eight week intervals. Half of the patients are to be given placebos.

If you are interested in taking part, are well enough to travel, and would like more information, please contact Dr Faisel Khan by post or email:

Dr Faisel Khan
Reader in Vascular Physiology
Vascular and Inflamatory Diseases Research Unit
Ninewells Hospital
Dundee
DD1 9SY

f.khan (at) dundee.ac.uk

ping!

2010-12-08T19:12:00.002+01:00

Hello Scotland.

How does it feel to know you might fall with every step? How does it feel to stumble, slip and crash to the ground if you attempt the great outdoors? How does it feel to have to cancel most of your outings/ guests/ meetings and plans over the past fortnight? Have you felt like a prisoner in your own home not knowing when you'll get out again? Felt useless to humans and angry at others not helping you (eg fixing your boiler)? Any resulting disasters on the home/ education/ deadline/ work/ social/ romantic front?

Welcome to my planet!
I prescribe a short treatment of thermals, crampons and greenhouse work.

Today's rudeness was brought to you via a flash of genius from my virtualflatmatefellowwriterartist, Emily. But don't kick her, kick me :-)

today in ice bullets

2010-12-07T19:21:00.006+01:00

scooter is ready in case of an early spring
Beth's homemade gingerbread men just in time for breakfast, mmm
entire lane sanded by Colin before I got up - woohoooo
compacted gritted snow on top of hard iced snow - my wheels can sorta manage this
they really can
I'm out
just in time for sunset
over an almost glassy, syrupy sea
not a breath of wind
with a huge bag of bird feed
a green sunset!
forgot gloves, pah, I am hardy
scooter really can manage this, omg
I've been released back into the wild
FREEEEEDDOOOOMMMM
crunchy zoooooom
(photographs, photographs, photographs)
crunchy zooooooooooooom
(feed birds, feed birds, feed birds)
crunchy zoooooooom
oops
what was that?
why have the lights gone out?
scooter has died
RIP scooter

2010-12-06T23:50:00.004+01:00

There are two emigration parties and three boat building sessions on my calender for this week. I think it might be something to do with the weather.

LET ME OUT

2010-12-04T21:58:00.007+01:00

Too late, alas, to take pressie to my virtual flatmate for her grand birthday (she was asleep again but HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMILY!) and too late to catch migrating neighbours, yet still in time for daylight, I was THIS CLOSE to getting down to the beach to sit in the snowy peachypink sunset with wraparound seascape.

My scooter got off the cleared section of pavement, onto the snow for half a metre then stuck fast in it. It would have taken someone else under two minutes to walk to the shore from there and probably only ten minutes to shovel the whole pathway clear it of snow. Me, my scooter and my neglected camera eventually reversed out of the snow and back into the house.

I will not cry in public
I will not cry in public
I will not bite passers by
I will not bite passers by
I will not burst from cabin fever
I will not burst from cabin fever
I will get into that beautiful snow
I will get into that beautiful snow
I will not steal a skidoo
I will not steal a skidoo
I will steal a skidoo
I will

Gave up on beachy wheely freedom and decided to be grateful for the fact that after sooo seated long I am able to cover some (smaller) distances with assorted walking sticks. The biscuit tin is mine mwuhhhhaa. And taxis can get into the lane again!

Tonight's good news from an even better source is that the Botanics have apparently cleared some paths of all snow and ice. Most sections of the gardens are open and passable even to wheelchairs so if you can get your chair into a vehicle and get out to the Botanics... go for it!

provisions

2010-12-03T14:57:00.004+01:00

Answers come to those who wait!

The Guardian Edinburgh today covered the offer of food available to housebound vunerable people: http://www.guardian.co.uk/edinburgh/2010/dec/03/edinburgh-snow-emergency-supplies-elderly-disabled-colinton

Vulnerable locals affected by the severe weather can have emergency supplies delivered to their door. The city council said it realised the freezing conditions have made it "almost impossible" for some people to get to shops to get food. Parcels containing UHT milk, tinned vegetables and fruit, teabags, biscuits, tins of corned beef/ham and other household goods will be available.

To qualify for this assistance the person must be elderly or an adult with significant disability, not currently in receipt of a home care service or have no close neighbour or relative living nearby who could help. The items are coming from the local Tesco in Colinton and the council's own staff are helping out with deliveries. Volunteers are also on standby from the Red Cross.

I woke to find that the pavement outside my house has been cleared, and there was also an offer by email to come round and do that from a friend in the village, which I may take up if we get more snow. I've just watched the funniest footage of my neighbour's horse playing in the snow. And my nearest neighbour is back from hols so its all improving here. I'm not sure a taxi could actually get into the lane to collect me but now at least I could get to the taxi if it did appear. For added luxury I'm hoping the path down to the prom is cleared soon, but that's just for fresh air, a sea view and sanity rather than neccessity.

These are my shopping hints for today. Even if the snow clears get them now and be ready for next time:

http://www.yaktrax.com/walker (thanks Charlie)
http://www.outdoorwarehouse.co.uk/index.cfm?action=shop.detail&pid=DDC2CD88-FF29-08BD-48EA8C02A3D2B051&ref=gbase

As I glance up I see a few new thick flakes falling... and a sunbeam! An actual sunbeam. I have to move to the windowseat to sunbathe, back in a minute.

I got to sleep at 6am this morning. Be impressed that I'm awake and alert(ish) in the afternoon. I don't have the heating on and apparently it's quite cold today but I'm so boiling hot I may have to open a window to get a cool breeze.

*** Update***
Twas not a mysterious pavement clearer, it was Andres and Nik of Row Porty! I am very chuffed.

four letter words for snow

2010-12-02T17:39:00.007+01:00

My windowsill snowman has leapt to his demise and broken both of his carrots.

I finally saw daylight today. I have also been brought provisions by the international expeditionary force of Edgars, but the proffered chance of an old-fashioned push down to the beach for a sunset photography session wasn't going to work because the snow is deep and sticky and the path that had been cleared yesterday was long gone. Perfect for walking in - if you do walking well. For some reason I thought the weather was on the turn yesterday so hadn't expected another level of it over everything today.

I was racking my brains wondering why there was such a need for local DIY path digging last year when I remember scootering out and about by myself, but of course it was when there was hard-packed snow, very slippery (for feet) and I could drive across it. Grit actually made it much harder to move by breaking up the smooth surface, but it looks as though too much grit isn't going to be a problem this year. I couldn't help with the path shovelling then but I did scooter out with flasks of soup and toddy, plus cake, to fuel the folk who hadn't already taken their shovels to the pub.

I see the bird feeders haven't been touched, nor has the hanging fruit and nuts, which is worrying as these back gardens support a lot of tiny songbirds and flocks of brightly coloured wee things that don't look fit for winter, as well of course as hefty pigeons, chunky blackbirds, enormous magpies and the odd gull. Between them they go through a feederful in under a week on a normal day so I was expecting to have to put out stuff on top of every snowfall this week. Please don't ask about Henry.

Tomorrow is apparently International Day of Disabled Persons. I am not sure what that means or what will be done for it. I'd have done a Lady Godiva down the prom to show that disabled does not mean not sexy, or done some storytelling in town as part of a festival, or even actually asked what other people are planning to do as displays/ awards/ demonstrations against inequality/ targetting busineses taking the piss or whatever, but erm, the snow is too deep for my puny wheels... If the city was planning a parade of the top Scottish disabled athletes, writers and business people down the Royal Mile I didn't hear about it. If the plan was instead to give free chocolate and ski fittings to every wheelchair owner I didn't hear about that either. And what exactly is disabled? I didn't check the criteria. The most disabled people I've ever met (in my gobby opinion) were the woman with no conscience and the man with no empathy and the many I've met who seem to be too lazy and moody to breathe. So don't ask me what disabled is.

I was tremendously excited by a date a few years ago that brought reasonable disabled access into public buildings as a requirement by law. I sped up the High Street the following week sure that every shop with steps would have ordered/ built a wee ramp from our local hardware shop. Not a thing had changed, and it turned out that to activate the law I'd have to actually make the requests/ threats/ legal action myself. Well I could have done that before, if I had the time and the energy and the alertness during office hours.

OH! I've just remembered something I was supposed to take some sort of action against. The city offered a buddy system for those who were housebound. I applied and was rejected as in their rules ME/CFS wasn't an eligible illness even if you were actually bedbound, and nor was arthritis if you also had ME/CFS as it could just be extra ME/CFS. Oh really? So who exactly gave them this advice? Let me take a wild guess. I am now hoping that the local services offering free help for the digital TV changeover haven't used the same fecking dodgy source of disinformation because their TV adverts do specify 'eligible illnesses only'.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/ouch/2010/12/un_international_day_of_person.html

sooking the air

2010-12-01T20:16:00.006+01:00

It wasn't quite the 'snow community laughing and shrieking in the sunshine' blast of fresh air that I'd imagined. It was 2am, as silent and lonely as a shoe, all traces of humans and other wildlife concealed beneath the newly fallen snow, not a breath of wind, and a completely magical landscape of sodium glow orange snow under the stars. I made a little snowman on my doorstep, put him on my windowsill with carrots for arms (I'm running low on vegetable options) and went to bed. Was zombied flat out till 5pm but have managed to sit up now to scoff the concents of the fruitbowl. From the look of the pavement (and blogged photos) there has been much action out there, but I haven't seen another person for ages, not with the hours my health is currently limiting me to.

How are other wheelchair users managing in the snow? Snowchains on tyres, scooter ski attachments, snowplough attachments, free taxis, priority help clearing paths and roads from the council roadcrews? I suppose the latter would only be on offer from cities not bankrupted by tramswindlers. Is there any infrastructure in place? Is there a contact to phone to request assistance - even paid-for assistance? Or to offer assistance to others? Is it even on the winter provisions list? Do doctors in wheelchairs just not do housecalls at this time of year, do lawyers in wheelchairs hand their clients to their colleagues, politicians miss their vote, are banks run from home, are hospital visits all missed?

My neighbours cleared my bit of pavement last night so in theory I could have got one of the winter tyre taxis (the others would never get down the lane) to the supermarket then into town to the City of Literature Salon to mingle with potential business contacts up from London, but the salons are still being held upstairs. Presumably none of the important visitors were wheelchair users.

In other news my new dehumidifier is my favourite toy. It has sooked several litres of moisture out of the air every day in the previously at-risk-of-damp back room, which is both awesome and disturbing.

tidy or be damned

2010-11-30T00:22:00.004+01:00

My hall looks as though Santa crashed into it earlier tonight. In fact, I think I can see antlers, oh god.

I decided that if I couldn't get outside by myself then gnashing and wailing and howling and sobbing wasn't going to inspire anyone to help me get outside, so I closed the door and got stuck into the terribly mundane and unseasonal act of spring cleaning and sorting misc.

Why does tidying make such a mess?

The Forest Cafe has a fundraising arts and craft fair lined up for the near future and I'm sure there's a jumble sale in the offing as well. It's a very good cause and the destination for the contents of my cupboard. If anyone wants to collect it, feel free, but there's a stack of stuff and I don't know what's wanted/ what'll sell. When its gone I'll be able to see my kitchen floor again and then there will be mucho baking for bartering. There will even be a clear table top for monoprinting, oh yes. The frustration and rage of this cabin fever on top of sleep reversal (not getting to sleep till 6am even with the best drugs is taking the piss) has made me strict and ruthless towards innocent cupboard contents.

The observant amongst you will notice that today's achievements do not include any useful or overdue W-R-I-T-I-N-G or A-R-T. If I put a fraction of my abilities into creating instead of repeatedly packing, unpacking and clearing space then I'd be onto my fifth novel and my sixteenth exhibition - or running an international furniture moving business.

However, today's 'unstoppable force' award goes to the staff of the pharmacy HS Kidd for trekking through the snow to ensure they delivered every home-delivery prescription :-)

how to torture anyone

2010-11-28T18:27:00.007+01:00

I was all ready. All waterproofs, thermals and art stuff I need in just one rucksack. Little plastic spade for building snowmen, biscuits and flask in case I meet anyone who needs sustenance (was thinking of the sit-in students or broken down drivers rather than myself at teatime), broken thumb strapped (I can use the scooter as long as I don't need to reverse), scooter recharged after quite a long neglect courtesy of the shingles, and a todo list that reaches hogmanay.

But I can't see any cleared or gritted paths nearby that I can use here or where I was headed, and if they were clear the falling snow must have covered it. In the absence of pushers wearing crampons (a good option in theory, but not nearby) I'm stuck. I'm well and truly stuck. I'm actually more upset about not being able to get into fresh air, snowy scenery, photogenic cityscapes or make my own snowman than anything else, but I assure you that's a severe enough last straw this weekend.

Ok, I know that the situation would be worse if I was a doctor with an emergency I couldn't reach, or if I had livestock to feed, or if my house needed a plumber who was herself iced in somewhere, but those things aside, this is my reality and all I wanted to do was get outside, throw my cabin fever into the sea, and join in with humans. Second on my list was getting to the shop round the corner. After a month of being stuck indoors, mainly in bed, sick and in agony, I am finally well enough to ditch the crappy wheelchair that requires a pusher, strong enough to use the scooter, finally well enough to get outside by myself - and I'm stuck on the doorstep unable to do anything except listen to the distant laughter of folk playing on the snowy beach. This wasn't the kind of by myself bit that I was after.

I do not have the words to tell you how much I loathe the indoors, claustrophobia, avoidable obstacles or my stupid useless wheels.

how to torture a writer

2010-11-11T13:04:00.007+01:00

Not sure if I'll be able to type this with my left hand but here goes.

It doesn't seem right to be thinking about myself on the 11th day of the 11th month, and to be fair at 11am I wasn't, but I feel the need to write.

I have shingles. I now have newfound medical knowledge. I have lost the use of my right arm. I am in agony and have no comfortable position to leave the useless arm in. On top of ME, this illness may have a nasty outcome, but we're not thinking about that today, no we're not.

In case you're fortunate enough to be unaware of shingles, its kinda chickenpox 2.0. Everyone who gets chickenpox carries the dormant virus around with them for the rest of their life. If you're lucky, you'll never see the little bastard again, but about 1 in 5 will see it re-emerge - as shingles. Usually those with compromised immune systems (tadaaah) or who are under a lot of stress/ sleeplessness (oops, that too) When chickenpox re-emerges, it does so via a nerve (pick a perve, any nerve) in a localised band of blisters, skin pain, neurological pain and muscular weakness that can last for months. In my case it's along the top right cross-section of my torso, plus arm.

I'm taking five hefty doses of antivirals a day but I've only just learned that they're only really effective if you start taking them as soon as the rash appears. As the rash could be anything until it really emerges in full and the other syptoms give enough clues, and as GPs are unavailable over the weekend (my traditional timing for new conditions/ injuries), it's pretty unlikely you'll get them on the most valuable day. My rash appeared on Thursday looking exactly like my teenage eczema. I thought I also had pulled muscles and the flu. It wasn't till Saturday morning that I could see how specific the rash was and how it had stabbing pains deep underneath like no eczema has, with surrounding skin that felt too scalded to touch. And I knew that I couldn't see a GP til Monday.

Obviously there was the option of a taxi to A&E to see a doctor, but you try turning up in your A&E on a Saturday night with a rash and see how impressed the doctor is, never mind what else you'll catch in the seven hours it'll take to be seen. Fortunately I had an idea what it might be by now, though no knowledge of what it meant (thankfully) and even better, my beloved virtual flatmate is a doctor. Alas, a non-prescribing doc, but getting a likely diagnosis on an array of nasty symptoms was enough to get me to sleep.

On Monday I was lucky enough to get an appointment. Moreover it was with a great GP who, having had shingles himself recently, knew what it was, was very keen to take it seriously and load me up with painkillers as well as the antivirals. His friendly, helpful bedside manner was what I needed at the time, but now that I learn more I see he didn't take enough notice of my already having ME and being fairly incapacitated and what the interaction was likely to mean, or if he did he didn't tell me.

I am in agony. I have a high pain threshhold but this is crazy pain, deep nerve pain that makes bones feel broken. It travels all the way up to the skin to blisters that are already getting infected despite my best efforts. Having skin too burning hot to bear the touch of clothing is not handy in winter. The nerve involved means that as from about midnight last night I lost the use of my right arm. For a righthanded person with a very weak left side due to the ME, who needs to put all weight on a stick to avoid falling on the way to the mobility scooter with right handed controls, this is not good. I'm going to have to call social services for a nurse/ aide now. I suppose I should just be grateful I didn't realise this after 5pm on a Friday.

I forgot to say, you can't catch shingles. I'd only be contagious if you hadn't had chickenpox in the past and rubbed my blisters hard enough to burst them. However, if you so much as tried to tap me on the shoulder right now, catching chickenpox would be the least of your worries.

I don't think this is going to be a productive writing week. I really just want to type AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHhhhhhhhh

November dates for your diary

2010-11-05T23:43:00.009+01:00

After that bombardment of fireworks, and with all that you were wearing now drying on the radiators, there can be no doubt that it is indeed November.

This year there was no shortage of effigies for the city's bonfires, marking as we have various reported scandals ranging from The Trams of Doom and NHS managers to this week's bankruptcy of the Edinburgh University Settlement; the owners of the buildings that housed The Roxy, The Forest Cafe and the GRV. The Forest fights on, so watch their website for all upcoming fundraisers and events so you can support them on this battle to stay open: http://www.theforest.org.uk/about

For those not planning to spend November bathed in NaNoWriMo ink, here are a few more (accessible) dates for the calender:

Inside The Herbarium: An Exhibition In Clay And Cloth
Sat 6 Nov 2010 — Sun 9 Jan 2011

Time:10.00 am
Location:Royal Botanic Garden Edinburgh (find us)
Venue:Gateway Gallery, outside the Patrick Geddes Room, upstairs in the John Hope Gateway
Price:Free
Age:All ages
Booking:No booking required

Ceramic artist Lorna Fraser and embroiderer Lucy Head present a new body of work inspired by their time working in the herbarium. Having access to the vast collection of specimens has provided a rich vein for exploration and reference.

Tuesday 9th November
BREAKIN' CONVENTION

The Bongo Club, 37 Holyrood Road
11pm - 3am
In 2010 we are Breakin' Convention once again! As one of the world's largest Hip Hop Dance Theatre festivals rolls into town then it only seems fitting that we close proceedings with a suitably large After Party. Dropping B-Boy beats, funk, urban anthems, disco, electro and dub-step mash-ups will be a host of DJ talent including Colin Millar [Headspin], Fryer [Motherfunk/Jazzman Records], Tony Thrills [Milk/Foundation) and Isla Blige.
Expect no-nonsense dance floor action from some of Scotland's best hip hop crews, the Breakin' Convention team and also international breakdance stars from France and Germany.
This event is not to be missed so lace up your old shelltoes, dust off the retro trackies and make sure you boogie on down for some mid-week mayhem. £5.
For more info on Breakin' Convention Edinburgh which touches down on Nov 8th and 9th at Edinburgh Festival Theatre then please visit http://www.eft.co.uk or phone 0131 529 6000

A Swing Through Time: sources for golf history - Talk
Thursday 11 November, 5.45pm

The origins of golf are a matter of mystery and controversy. Only by piecing together evidence from documents and texts is it possible to gain an insight into the early days of the game. Scotland dominated golf until about 1900, giving the game its distinctive rules, language and courses. In this talk Olive Geddes, NLS curator, explores the written sources for the history of golf in Scotland.

An Edinburgh Bibliography Society Event
at the National Library of Scotland, George IV Bridge

Saturday 20th November
Auld Reekie Roller Girls vs Berlin

2pm afternoon match
Meadowbank Sports Centre
£8 (under 14s free)
http://www.arrg.co.uk/events.php

then head along the road to:

Saturday 20th November
Row Porty fundraising ceilidh

Row Porty (as in rowing boat!) invite you to their fundraising ceilidh with the Robert Fish Band.... on Saturday 20 NOVEMBER from 7pm – 11pm at Portobello Community Centre, Adelphi Grove, Portobello.

Tickets are £10 available from The Beach House on Portobello Promenade, Woodwares on Portobello High Street, or the hardy rowers themselves. When they're gone, they're gone

Cheques payable to Portobello Sailing and Kayak Club

Proceeds will go to help keep our existing community built boat, 'Ice Breaker', in the style that it is accustomed to, so that it can continue to be enjoyed by all. We will also be fundraising for what will be the biggest- and we hope the best - event on the skiff racing calendar when we once again bring the regatta to Porty in July 2011.

Please support us! See you all there.

http://rowporty.org.uk/

or, for those staying defiantly in town:

Saturday, 20th November, 7:30pm
Days of the Decameron
Music and Tales from Medieval Italy

Scotland's medieval music specialists Gaita present a programme of music and stories inspired by Boccaccio’s Decameron in which ten young nobles escape plague-ridden Florence for a villa in the hills, and spend ten days in singing, dancing and telling tales.
St James Episcopal Church
57b Inverleith Row, Edinburgh, EH3 5PX
Entry by Donation
For more information contact Chris Elmes: 0131 557 2397

Wednesday 24th November
Writers' Bloc Wee Red Gig

Wee Red Bar, Edinburgh College of Art, Lady Lawson Street

Do you write short fiction?

Can you read it on stage?

We think there are more than enough opportunities for performance poets
around Edinburgh and not nearly enough for performance prosers*. So
we're putting on a gig and we're looking for readers. You could be one.

The Wee Red Gig on Wednesday 24th November will showcase a number of
new voices, all delivering their own material to an enthusiastic audience.
If you're interested, send us the story or extract you want to read.
It can be up to 800 words.

The Wee Red Gig is organised by Writers' Bloc, a spoken word performance
collective which has been putting on themed shows in Edinburgh and
beyond for nine years. We like punchy, surprising, macabre or funny
work, mainstream or genre. Our veteran readers will be there to help
out and contribute five minutes of their own. We won't pay you, but we
will buy each reader a drink.

Has it got to be your own work? Yes!

Can you read poetry? No!

The submission address is weeredgig@gmx.co.uk and your deadline is
November 14th, so don't hang around!

* we do not like that word either.

http://www.writers-bloc.org.uk/

for something further out of town:
Lennoxlove Book Festival
19th - 21st November
Haddington
http://www.lennoxlovebookfestival.com/

and just in case you were wondering about NaNoWriMo...
http://www.nanowrimo.org/

2010-10-22T01:34:00.002+02:00

I have (apart from the usual):

An invitation to the preview night with Alasdair Gray (I want to go - he's amazing!)

Insomnia due to inability to breathe while unconscious (I tested this. It wasn't fun)

Four writing-from-bed deadlines next week (but M.E brainfog has taken my brains)

Arthritic pain so bad in one finger more than others that I wonder if perhaps its broken.

The flu. This is very rare with my overactive immune system so I'm a bit scuppered by these extra symptoms.

Morrison Street access

2010-10-20T16:02:00.007+02:00

Congratulations City of Edinburgh Council. Your new pavements along the bits of Morrison Street leading up to the EICC have no wheelchair crossings. Oh they have been bobbled and lowered, but are still high enough to cause whiplash and a broken scooter. The pavement across the road had one access - and no other. You can get on but you have to go back the way you came, if you can turn. After careering round and round the area like I was on elastic I finally had to drive on the road (including two junctions with blind corners), take the only flat enough pavement edge onto the EICC taxi rank to use a vehicle to get out of the area. I imagine there was one more lowered edge on the other end of the EICC pavement but roadwork fencing was blocking it off and the works' detour round the road had a drop down one of the highest pavements I've seen yet. Cheers for that. The taxi bill is in the post. My physio's bill will be following it.

2010-10-18T22:28:00.006+02:00

Escaped from the house today with only a couple of hours of daylight to spare. It turned out to be rather good timing. The light was golden, the sea quite calm, the clouds turning pink and the air not too cold. It was one of those seaside village days when I immediately started meeting people I like. Neighbours, rowers (boat club as opposed to argumentative types) even strangers. There's something about the sunshine and the sea that brings out the perky in people. I'd have nipped in for a swim if I could have .

Had an illicit chip butty to celebrate it being Monday. I'm supposed to only be eating salad so shhh, don't tell anyone. Pretend I look healthy next time you see me. I don't yet know how this restriction is going to tie in easily with restaurant reviewing, but I don't get out much and I have no table manners so it might turn into take-away reviewing...

There's a varied selection of culture this weekend. Can't recommend The Roxy as it's inaccessible, which is a rotten shame given the array of amazing performers and events in the Hidden Door festival. WWWrestling comes to Portobello Town Hall on Friday, The Alisdair Gray exhibition opens at the Talbot Rice on Saturday (lift access all areas) on till 11th December, there are pre-halloween 'scary goings-on' at the Zoo and the Chambers Street Museum; the Botanics (and Water of Leith) are looking glorious, Central Library is hosting Big Heid Day on Saturday where you can join in drawing models of the Scott Monument, and a new life drawing class starts in Whitespace in Gayfield Square this Sunday. Statues across the city will be sporting tartan accessories, so take your camera.

The sad news is that the university are putting Forest Church (3 Bristo Place) up for sale so our beloved Forest Cafe will be on the move after ten years growing and developing - it even has its own Festival Fringe in August. Come along and enjoy the (ground floor of the) venue before the developers maul it. Good, cheap veggie food, Gramophone Hour, Golden Hour, the art gallery, language groups, crafty clubs... check website for details and events diary: http://forestcafe.tumblr.com/

Apart from that I don't what else is going on in town because I haven't been paying attention. I'm struggling to supervise a spring clean, prep for winter writing and wrestle with art. So far the results are: one wheezing, creaky, dusty person (me!) wrapped in a paint-splodged duvet; several paint-splodged passers-by (sorry); more than ten boxes of things ready to evict; enough ex paperwork to light a decent sized bonfire; two newly-started sketchbooks, a bag of used stamps and three hours of costume sorting-by-proxy that has left me feeling like Mr Ben.

Happy Birthday Mum xxx

10/10/10

2010-10-10T09:39:00.003+02:00

Celebrate the power of ten on the Meadows this afternoon
http://madeleineshepherd.blogspot.com/2010/10/powers-of-ten-picnic.html
as part of the powers of ten day http://www.powersof10.com/

Happy 10/10/10!
otherwise known as 42 day
http://www.fortytwoday.com/

What is the meaning of your life?

next Bloc

2010-10-08T10:24:00.004+02:00

Did I mention that the next big Writers' Bloc show will be on All Souls Day? That's the 2nd November and it'll be around a 7.30/ 8pm start at the Ghillie Dhu. All will be revealed very shortly at: http://www.writers-bloc.org.uk/

in other creative news:

Yesterday's National Poetry (and cake) Day went well. We had our own small nod to it in the evening with Ephemeris cakes (Happy Birthday David!) and the striped presence of poet Janie MacKie :-)

I still can't get to the V&A but it appears to be getting closer to me: http://www.guardian.co.uk/travel/2010/oct/03/dundee-bilbao-victoria-and-albert-museum#start-of-comments

On the topic of scale and perception we have both: http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/culturelab/2010/10/art-scaled-up-and-down.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news
and to celebrate 10/10/10 (Sunday) http://madeleineshepherd.blogspot.com/2010/10/powers-of-ten-picnic.html

and music: http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/edinburgh/Longlost-concerto-by-Vivaldi-discovered.6569788.jp

and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHIrlcmHTME&feature=related

Doctor Who

2010-10-03T15:17:00.009+02:00

I was up yesterday but my vision was too blurred to write anything substantial. I try not to think about eyesight deterioration or the consequences. The opthalmologist says he's keeping an eye on it. No really, he says that with a straight face.

Thanks to broken sleep cycles I dream almost all of the time I'm asleep. This isn't healthy but it does provide interesting material - if I actually write it down. And if I can read my writing the next day. Anyway, I sleep with a notebook and pen under my pillow to jot down dreams. This has caused incidents in the past. To those I've sliced at night, I apologise. But if you want to sleep well/ often/ safely; don't date a writer.

I mainly blame Twitter for my first dream last night, though email and FB are also guilty. I'd skimmed through the backlog of tweets on my laptop, complete with soundbites and links from entertaining strangers and acquaintences.

Bed. Within an hour I was out in the park with the Mark Thomas listers watching the dog training. The dogs were wearing sunglasses, styling their own hair and teaching each other tricks. The only thing that could have moved any of the riveted onlookers at that point was the shocking revelation about the new series of Doctor Who now sweeping across Edinburgh: Neil Gaiman has redesigned the TARDIS. It's now Victorian, tartan (goth-level tartan) and powered by intergalactic bagpipes. If Queen Victoria had been a goth, Balmoral would look like the Gaiman TARDIS.

The programme starts - all around us. Doctor Who is wearing a (21st kilt and his armchair has black lace antimacassars. The teapots are filled with mead. Minchin (Doctor..?) is on piano (six foot cock and ten thousand virgins) Oh no, the interaction of the design features are causing a rip in the space-time continuim and parts of the Stephen dancers are vanishing - Fry's (Doctor..?) arm, his hand still holding a pint glass of mead, has gone and Tomkison's too - oh no!

The answer is clear; we need techs, geeks, Stross and Rankin. It's Saturday night so everyone will be in a pub. There are only two kinds of pub in Edinburgh; ones for football fans and ones for Doctor Who fans. We've got to materialise in the right pub or the whole series will be lost...

The week ahead

2010-10-01T15:46:00.011+02:00

26 Treasures at the V&A has been extended to the 26th October! If you're in London for the weekend, go have a look at the treasure trail. My nautilus cup and creation story are in there and online. The V&A actually have several nautilus cups but mine is the Frewen cup. Disregard any photo you saw me working from earlier :-) http://www.26treasures.com/ and http://26treasures.tumblr.com/post/1241483607/you-still-have-time
(peer closely at that third photo down..)

This weekend sees the second Portobello Organic Marketplace held in Rosefield Park on Saturday 2nd. I know the rain looks imminent but last week the cake and bread stalls were selling out by mid-morning, so its popular enough to be waterproof, probably. In town its the huge International Glass Conference at ECA, from today till Monday 4th. If you thought glass art was just paperweights, go see these artists sculpt, twist, scrape and enamel. http://www.scotlandsglass.co.uk/cms/

I was also going to recommend the Hispanic Arts Festival, this weekend from tonight's (Fri 1st) opening party onwards, but I've just called the music library on George IV Bridge and they've explained (and apologised) that there is no wheelchair access at all to the venue.

During the week there are drop-in arty crafty evenings
Granny Green's Big Night Out, Monday, 6pm - 9pm at The Lot, Grassmarket then Tuesday 6.30pm - 9.30pm at the Spider and the Fly, Bread Street to make your own badges.

Thursday is National Poetry Day, so you (with or without favourite poem in hand) will be welcome at the Scottish Poetry Library from 3pm for a literary cuppa.

Next weekend sees the Usher Hall's grand reopening, complete with more disabled access than before. It has actually already opened and has shows running all week but there you go.
Houston Symphony – Sunday 10 October 2010
19:00
Holst’s The Planets
NASA - the Universe!!

The Usher Hall has an exciting official reopening on 10 October 2010. Whilst you listen to the internationally acclaimed Houston Symphony playing The Planets, watch images recorded from space on a large 24 foot screen. This combination will be an experience to remember. The beautiful and mystifying music will transport you to another galaxy! When the Houston Symphony collaborated with NASA and award winning producer/director Duncan Copp this monumental and innovative project was the result.

£35/£30/£25/£20/£15 - Concessions £2 off

If you're in Glasgow, there's always the Steampunk market bazaar in the Britannia Panopticon Music Hall, the oldest surviving music hall in the world, Sunday 3rd. Stalls and entertainment. I was thinking of having a stall there to clear a cupboard of costume, but not now. If you're still out West next weekend try the Girl Geek Dinner for some creative networking.

I've found lovely big mushrooms at the bottom of my garden for the first time ever. They look tasty (as in I think I recognise them as edible) so I might test them to see what happens. Embrace the season for yourself by heading to the Botanics to learn more about the mould around you: Aspergillus & Candida: Fungus in the Air & in Our Guts - Sat 2 & Sun 3 Oct
Fungi: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly - Thurs 14 Oct. A talk by Dr Lynne Boddy, President of the British Mycological Society.
Fungi Fun - Sat 16 & Sun 17 Oct. Hands on Activities for all the family. Don't get your hopes up; despite the name of the workshop they won't be doing magic mushrooms.
Fungi Under the Microscope - Sat 23 & Sun 24 Oct. See amazing time-lapse photography.
Fungi Finds - Sun 31 Oct . Mycologist Neville Kilkenny displays locally collected fungi.

Don't forget the fruit. If you're mobile and the paths aren't too muddy for yer wheels, you can collect enough in the way of hedgrow and woodland apples, rosehips and brambles to feed yourself for free all month. Otherwise head back to the Botanics for their Apple Day next weekend (Saturday 9th) 11am - 4pm, or the later Apple Day in the Portobello Community Orchard, Brunstane Road South where the tastings will be followed by a bonfire and fireside musicians. 2pm onwards, 16th October. http://pedal-porty.org.uk/2010/09/apple-day/

Bon appetite.

art and science in the news this week

2010-09-23T17:21:00.007+02:00

This week has seen an inundation of articles fusing art, medicine and science. And local art world news. I hereby present the links so you may read them for yourself:

http://www.newscientist.com/special/six-ways-that-artists-hack-your-brain?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20727781.300-brainhacking-art-making-an-emotional-impression.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/edinburgh/Gallery-chief-critically-ill-after.6544494.jp

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20727781.100-brainhacking-art-twisting-mirrors-unreal-shadows.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

http://www.londonlongcopy.com/How-to-Enter.aspx

http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn19471-brains-grey-matter-helps-you-introspect.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/culturelab/2010/09/robots-draw-graffiti-over-london-landmark.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20727781.500-brainhacking-art-getting-your-wires-crossed.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news

That last article is timely; I was just talking about synaesthesia with my friends during the week. When I was wee, I thought it was normal to choose colours by the way they tasted or felt or sounded, so I never mentioned it. When I was a tween I decided it probably wasn't normal so I'd better not mention it. I still rarely mention it but there, I've said it now. Do you still wonder why I only wear black?

happy equinox

2010-09-22T10:41:00.005+02:00

One day Scotland may move its rocky bulk to a region where the decline in temperature isn't accompanied by such a dramatic reduction in light levels. Until then, I must celebrate the autumn equinox while pretending that I can tolerate the prospect of darkness ahead. I love the darkness; I just need to balance it with sunshine. Within the same day, preferably. I don't notice the cold. The actual nocturnal darkness will bring the opportunity to see the full Harvest moon on the equinox and also Jupiter close by.

It's the Golden Hour at the Forest Cafe on Bristo Place tonight (Wednesday) from 8pm if you fancy listening to storytellers and music. (free, BYOB). Wheelchair access to the ground floor.

To make the most of the sunshine hours at the weekend, Prestonpans is invaded in full historical regalia for the Battle of Prestonpans stretched to cover Saturday 25th and Sunday 26th, while Musselburgh racecourse hosts the Royal Scots family day at the races on Sunday from noon till teatime. Entrance is pricey but the racecourse will feature many forms of entertainment, including The Golden Lions parachute display team (I'll be watching) though if the wind picks up, the parachute regiment could feature in Sunday's segment of the Battle of Prestonpans instead. Closer to home the Canal Parade sees both an assortment of watercraft and landbased entertainment all the way from Tollcross Basin out to Ratho. You don't have to worry about choppy water if the weather is bad; the canal isn't very deep.

If you are of a more indoors and retail-ish persuasion there's The Bead Fair at the Corn Exchange on Sunday 26th, 11am - 4.30pm (£4). There are other craft fairs this weekend but this is the only wheelchair accessible one as far as I know (let me know if not!)

Painting Edinburgh Green will be held in the Out of the Blue Drill Hall, Dalmeny Street 11am to 4pm both Saturday and Sunday http://transitionedinburgh.wordpress.com./
for more information on how you can take part in embracing a more sustainable lifestyle.

Speaking of sustainable lifestyles, I've been stuck indoors ill and inconsolable for two weeks now, so getting out on the autumn equinox means I will be thinking my own inner celebratory thoughts as well as the seasonal ones. If I get my hands on the paraffin I'll be having some visible celebrations too.

Religions and spirituality of all variations feature this week. My friend Emily has the first of her book signing events on Thursday 23rd at noon at the Faith Mission Christian bookshop on Gilmerton Road, for the newly released 'A time to care - loving your elderly parents'.

Ohhh I almost forgot! It's Doors Open Day all across the city this weekend, with so many venues to choose from that even with access issues there are plenty of strange things to get into: http://www.doorsopendays.org.uk/opendays/area_programmes.aspx?areaid=16
Edinburgh Doors Open Day is organised by The Cockburn Association (Edinburgh's Civic Trust), with support from Brown Shipley. Now in its 20th year, the event has become one of the capital's most popular free days out.

This is your chance to explore some of Edinburgh's most architecturally, culturally and socially significant buildings. From heritage landmarks to the newest of the capital's architecture, Doors Open Day offers visitors free access to properties that are either not usually open to the public, or would normally charge an entry fee.

All venues feature behind the scenes tours, activities, exhibitions and/or talks which bring the history of the building and its everyday use to life. Many sites organise additional free activities for children and families.

2010-09-08T19:48:00.008+02:00

As someone who has moved house 14 times in 15 years, my packing, unpacking and charity shop eviction skills know no bounds - in theory. As someone ill and in pain, the boundaries are verging on the ridiculous. With my bedroom filled to the gunwhales from the flit last week, I had to just shut the door and ignore it because helping clear out the Big Red Door - and spending as much time with the others as possible before they head for the hills, or to the next job - is my priority this week. Even if all you can do is sit in a corner and feed cookies to those hefting luggage past, it's better than doing nothing (keep telling yourself that when all feels futile).

Not today though, the room didn't stop spinning so there were no corners in which to sit. I'm sitting up in bed pouring with sweat but thinking there probably isn't a heatwave. I'm even feeling peckish now, but in the absence of ability and mobility, I'm going to have to phone the cafe and ask them to bring a baked tattie and salad round.

So that's my weekend probably curtailed to the point of barely a brief bonfire but what does this weekend hold for those taking a break from actually working for a living? Well, the Leuchars Airshow is on Saturday but don't go through to Leuchars for it unless you actively enjoy neck strain and traffic jams; go up a hill (there's a good selection) and watch from a slight distance. Its too late to register your firey steed for Sunday's Edinburgh March Riding horse procession but you can still go watch the lucky (faster) 250 or so riders. Its the closest most of us will get to watching wild animals stampede across the great plains. I am biased because I like horses and smartly turned-out riders but my feelings are mixed about the pecking order.

Anyone with a garden or a lottie, for Dawkin's sake take a shovel and a bucket with you as there will be free fertiliser in abundance. Check the parade route to see when it passes nearest your roses. That reminds me, I see a small, aging geranium in the garden has just produced a little white bud, optimistically waiting to unfurl in tomorrow's sunshine.

http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/edinburgh/Riders-saddle-up-again-for.6519340.jp

Starting at Lang Loan Road at 10.30am, heading to Cragmiller Castle then Holyrood Park. Check the website for the rest of the route and viewing details.

Big Red Door costume & prop sale

2010-09-02T01:04:00.014+02:00

Theatre costumes, props and furniture sale
Saturday 4th Sept
11am - 6pm
Big Red Door
10 Lady Lawson Street
(wheelchair accessible)

a corner of the wardrobe

This Saturday you have the chance to go behind the scenes of tePOOKa's Big Red Door and explore the contents of the best dressing up box in the city. The costumes, accessories, props, furniture, fittings and theatrical misc are all for sale and must all go as our Door is sadly about to close forever.

If you've ever wanted to do a Mr Ben, if you've ever thought Armstrongs was too expensive to buy more than one party oufit at a time, if you're putting on a play, if you want to transform your flat/ partner/ offsping/ garden/ shed, if you're looking for material for a crafty project, or just if you've ever loved the Big Red Door household, come along on Saturday with carrier bags, rucksacks and spending money. Maybe bring a van too as there are settees, armchairs, lighting rigs, workbenches and chests of drawers (full of beads, feathers, zips and threads, mmm) to go too.

And stilts, scaffolding, platforms, unicycles, mirrors, dragons, drums, horns, flags, banners, wood, whips, keyboards, clothes rails, curtains... BUY BUY BUY

A moment from the farewell final cabaret last weekend - seven fantastic hours of talent!

2010-08-27T01:49:00.008+02:00

Thinking September is looking empty compared to August? If you're interested, you could have a look at my checklist:

Is your name on the organ donor register? Is the card in your wallet and an information cylinder in your fridge?
Give blood, if you're allowed to. Reward yourself with cake. Morningside is nearby; you can do the Chocolate Tree and Loopy Lorna's.
Make a will. You are unlikely to be hit by a tram in the near future, not here, but you could fall off a cliff. Its a hilly city.
Put EVERYTHING in writing. Don't make any verbal agreements with ANYONE regarding what happens in your absence or as additional clauses to your will, write them all down. At best the executor might have a very bad memory, at worst they might be a duplicitous little shit. In between they might just be a sociopath. You really don't want to leave anyone drowning in guilt and helplessness and fury as well as grief when they become the ignored official witness to an ignored verbal agreement.
Do, however, remember to tell the relevant people!
Clear out your wardrobe. Charity shops are waiting for your sartorial errors.

There you go, that's the first week of September sorted. Wait till you see my list for the second week :-)

Art Late plus

2010-08-26T18:14:00.007+02:00

Art Late tonight, check website to plan your route or just join in the afterparty.
http://www.edinburghartfestival.com/ I can't go but I'm bursting keen to get across town to visit the Union Gallery http://www.uniongallery.co.uk/ in a couple of weeks, not least because two of their artists are tutors I had, and they were inspirational.

I have been in bed so missed any more schmoozing, sorry, business opportunities, but Writers' Bloc comrade Gavin Inglis was snapped up when he reappeared at the book festival during daylight hours: http://audioboo.fm/boos/171888-gavin-inglis-from-writers-bloc-reads-stomp-59

There's a recording of myself and Lindsay too. It was done after StoryShop so my voice is getting croaky and my mind is wandering (towards iced water): http://audioboo.fm/boos/167233-storyshop-writer-morag-edward-reads-an-extract-from-cello-man

I think we should do more of those :-) It would also mean we could still include comrade Stefan Pearson, who has just moved to France. Seriously, I do mean just moved; he left the day after the book festival cabaret and is still on the road.

If you want to buy costumes and props from the Big Red Door head along to 10 Lady Lawson Street in the afternoon. Cabaret at night, second last ever, 9pm - 1am, music till 3am. BYOB.

For Sunday, the Out of the Blue Drill Hall http://www.outoftheblue.org.uk/index.htm
the Bongo Club http://www.thebongoclub.co.uk/
the Forest Cafe http://forestcafe.tumblr.com/
and the Botanics http://www.rbge.org.uk/whats-on/home
are accessible slightly hippy venues worth trying your wheels at to see what's on, if you don't already have specific plans for the Fringe. If you can cope with dodgy pavement edges then head down into the Cowgate and you will find some fabulous Underbelly show selections.

2010-08-25T17:26:00.002+02:00

Woken by a nosebleed and birdsong. Well, that makes for variety, I suppose.

2010-08-25T02:08:00.006+02:00

That was enormous fun! Writers' Bloc at Unbound at the book festival went so well that it might be my favourite gig yet. I really hope the audience enjoyed it as much as we did. Thank you for coming along! Thanks also to Nick and the book festival staff, who were on top form tonight. It was a fantastic opportunity. It was also a rare chance to exciteably catch up with folk I haven't seen in ages. I wish I'd been able to reach all the folk I recognised in the crowd! The Bloc Press chapbooks and Mark Harding's new anthology were on sale so I hope you enjoy tonight's bedtime reading. If you saw me zooming out of the place after the gig tonight, that bloke who was pushing my wheelchair writes rather good books too ;-)

I am utterly spangled. What a week - and I've been outside TWICE. My extremely painful neck and wheezing lungs testify to that as they don't take kindly from going to static sea air mode to bump, shoogledy traffic fume mode. The cars in front of the taxi crashed just as the book festival tents came into view, so that was enough to wake me up properly. No-one was hurt badly but those cars will never walz again.

There's massive trauma on planet velocity-m at the moment - I feel like I've suddenly woken up under gunfire and in a minefield. I know its possible to release stress by writing hard but jeeez, I don't think I can write fast enough for long enough to take any more of this kind of anguish. If I can then I know who to dedicate the book to. In fact, make it dedicate the trilogy to. I can only hope that the royalties will pay for the therapy I'm going to need.

I'm very much looking forward to returning to the bosom of my adopted family this weekend, and curling up in a corner. The Big Red Door household will be at home to give you two final cabarets then no more, its all gone and the Door will close. tePOOKa will carry on but there will be no more Door. Please come and join us to wave farewell to Lord Lawson this weekend. There may be tears, but there will be talent. Thursday and Friday afternoon the Door will be open for you to come in and buy costumes and props then on Friday and Saturday 9pm - 1am there will be cabaret. BYOB and bring spending pennies too in case you spot a costume or wall-hanging or chaise-longue that you want to take home, but most of all, bring yourself!

Its 1am and the painkillers have started to work, but I'm too full of book festival sandwiches to lie down flat and go to sleep. I spose I could lean out of the window to see if Henry is around but I think I'd better stay still.

There are other things to look forward to - thankfully - including the Portobello Big Beach Busk on Saturday from noon till, er, possibly Monday at this rate. Everyone is welcome, whether to perform or watch as the prom fill with as many weird and wonderful performers as possible. And my beloved flatmate Emily's book launch is rapidly approaching. Hoorah for books. They keep us alive.

climate camp

2010-08-23T12:47:00.009+02:00

As its pissing down with rain (albeit quite warm rain) now would be a good time to join or support the climate camp protestors and activists around Edinburgh as they try to encourage the Royal Bank of Scotland to stop lending money to companies who pollute on a massive scale. They're also raising awareness in Edinburgh that the proposed biomass fuelled power-plant for Leith will cause bad air pollution in the area (as well as contributing globally) kinda the opposite of what was claimed by the company when locals asked. Its also not 'getting rid of local waste' - its planning to ship woodchips in from abroad.

Follow news snippets on www.guardian.co.uk/environment/blog/2010/aug/23/climate-camp-day-action-edinburgh/

and if you are a twitterer look for the tag #climatecamp

This is not just something for the hippies - read all about it!

Unfortunately for me, the Edinburgh International Book Festival is sponsored by RBS, among others, so there will be protestors there too tomorrow night when I go in. Should I be one of the protestors instead? I think I could do more as an insider than from the outside. I feel torn about how to address this because I support the book festival, but not RBS's current behaviour, not at all.

When I was little I won an art prize but when I went to the gallery for the award, I couldn't get past angry picketers. It was pretty alarming and I didn't know what was going on. Turned out the prize was sponsored by BP, and that was why there was so much protesting. That's one way to learn about BP! If I hadn't had the headsup today that the book festival was sponsored by RBS, I guess tomorrow I'd be having a flashback to being eight years old again.

book festival cabaret

2010-08-22T19:58:00.005+02:00

Unbound, the new evening cabaret at the book festival, is going down veeerry well. It started with a bang a week ago, no, it really did, Gutter press read Tartan Porn. A variety of famous and infamous author-performers have been entertaining/ horrifying/ alarming the audience ever since.

Its our turn now so Writers' Bloc will be on stage in the Spiegeltent, Charlotte Square Gardens on Tuesday night (24th Aug) from 9pm till 11.30pm. Tis free.

http://www.writers-bloc.org.uk/
http://www.edbookfest.co.uk/

free cake!

2010-08-21T23:23:00.002+02:00

Sunday 22nd August
Pleasance Courtyard
2pm
Free cake!

'nuff said.

book festival feedback

2010-08-18T14:23:00.004+02:00

Ok, after yet another sad wee message from folk who'd tried to get in to Story Shop to hear me on Sunday but couldn't find me, I am getting a picture of what happened to them all.

1) They looked for my name listed outside a tent. Nope, it was only in the main entrance hall. I must admit I checked the whiteboard outside the bookshop as I wheeled in and spotted that it wasn't there, nor was there a mention of Story Shop...
2) They asked EIBF staff, who didn't know what they meant by Story Shop. (OHHHHH!)
3) They haven't been to the venue before and couldn't spot the bookshop through the crowds.

Why do I feel so guilty?!

free stories at the book festival!

2010-08-16T17:46:00.005+02:00

Every day at 10am (Ten at Ten) and 4pm (StoryShop) you can have a free slice of literature read by a new author in the corner of the Edinburgh International Book Festival bookshop in Charlotte Square Gardens. Yesterday it was me! In the 4pm slot obviously, nobody who knows me would suggest I attempt the English language in the morning. The afternoon was challenge enough.

My favourite cellist Lindsay Martindale accompanied me in the tragic tale of Cello Man, a teeny extract of which was recorded afterwards for the EIBF site. We had a heatwave, we had Bach, we had Elgar, we almost had Saint Saens but changed our minds last week. It was wonderful to see so many friends in the audience, though I was too fried afterwards to leap on them all. We also had the company of Michel Faber!

I LOVE mutlimedia storytelling and have sooo many old sketches for more. More cello too, it can give goosebumps. So far I've read with drums, with trapeze and acro, and a nearby pole-dancer. Now that's what you need for bedtime stories. Speaking of which, the first of the nightly cabaret slots of the book festival's 'Unbound' was on Sunday too, courtesy of Gutter Press, but I was in bed by then with ice packs on me joints. I would have loved to have heard their literary porn in action. Was it MacPorn or Tartan Porn? Ohh that reminds me, I'd never heard my stories called Tartan Noir before.

Did I mention all this is free? Hoorah for free ink. Get yourself across to the EIBF's website to peruse the menu and buy tickets or just head to the gardens and get some wee freebies. There will be another Writers' Bloc comrade at Story Shop too: Stefan Pearson on Friday 20th, 4pm.
http://www.edbookfest.co.uk/

Tonight try the other Spiegeltent, the one in George Square, for the wonderful Horndogs, 9pm - 11pm, freeee.

Before I go back to sleep, I need to thank the captain of the ole pirate ship Radio Free Porty for rescuing me when my printer broke down as I was preparing my scripts for the Story Shop reading - without him I'd have been reading from memory.

eating the Edinburgh festivals

2010-08-13T03:20:00.005+02:00

In the wee small hours of post-meteor surfing I discovered this new page of Edinburgh eatery listings for vegans, written by someone I know with good taste in interesting food, and a timely co-incidence as I have been searching online for my own list (and recipes) this summer. I haven't yet cross-referenced it with access, though I can already recommend my favourite from the list: The Mosque Kitchen (Edinburgh Central Mosque, 50 Potterrow) as well as The Regent (2 Montrose Terrace) and The Auld Hoose (23 - 25 St Leonard's Street)

http://nacmanvegan.wordpress.com/vegan-friendly-edinburgh/

2010-08-12T11:25:00.010+02:00

Here are the details of the storytelling I mentioned, by my Writers' Bloc comrades, Mr Andrew C Ferguson and Mr Gavin Inglis, in any wheely accessible shows (including one with me in it too...):

Andrew C Ferguson's Wee Free Fringe (and other August shows)

Sunday 22nd and Wednesday 25th August
Chaos Raging Sweet
14:50 to 15:50
Banqueting Hall, Banshee Labyrinth, Niddy Street
Andrew C Ferguson and Rob MarKenzie introduce some of the UK's best poets and their most musical work to explore the blurred boundaries.

Tuesday 24th
Writers' Bloc @ Unbound
EIBF, Charlotte Square Gardens
21:00 to 01:00
Free

Thursday 26th
19:30 to 20:30
Utter! The Brave
Part of the Utter! Spoken word series
Banshee Labyrinth Banqueting Hall, Niddry Street
Free top-quality storytelling and poetry from the Fringe's funniest writers. New Themed shows daily.

and...

Gavin Inglis will be also be appearing at:
The Captain's Bar
Thursday 12th (tonight!) Wednesday 18th and Saturday 21st
20:30 onwards

Friday 13th
Utter!
with stories from Gav's chapbook 'Crap Ghosts'
19:30 onwards
Banshee Labyrinth Banqueting Hall, Niddry Street

and...

Apparently some of the winners of the #UnboundEd storytelling competition tweets will be read at Bloc Unbound's night on the 24th at the EIBF - I've just read that in an @edbookfest tweet!

Yep, after so long refusing to be sucked into the distraction of Twittering I have succumbed. As with Facebook, it seemed like the only way to find out what's going on in town. I am @velocityM if you wish to follow me around too. I don't go far. I've just started #accessiblevenuesedinburgh if you have discoveries to share.

storming the gardens

2010-08-11T19:52:00.005+02:00

I have to show you what my friend David made me when I told him I'd be doing the book festival in Charlotte Square Gardens on Sunday:

city of festivals

2010-08-10T21:46:00.017+02:00

I'm not going to even try to suggest a full list of newly-discovered or hit shows for you this week. I know that by now you will have noticed for yourself that there are already more top event recommendations than days in the year so trying to logically select a mere ten shows per day will only make you cry. Go for random - or stalk someone with good taste, even a reviewer :-)
Also, most of the variety and cabaret nights across the city vary from night to night as different performers appear.

Many of the stand-up venues are unfortunately inaccessible but a newly listed venue smooth enough to wheel into is the Captain's Bar, South College Street. Bloc colleagues Gavin Inglis, Andrew J Wilson and Andrew C Ferguson will be there some nights and I can vouch for their storytelling prowess. The Bongo Club Cabaret, Holyrood Road is another accessible venue worth scooting along to (ask the door staff to bring out the ramp). Some more accessible-venue hints are:

The Big Red Door, Lady Lawson Street. BRD is of course having its final season and will be open every Friday, Saturday and Sunday of August, £5 entry, BYOB, for a full night of innovative cabaret and household circus. There are daytime classes and workshops too.

Desmond O Connor (the young kinky one) and assorted comrades are in the Ghillie Dhu, Rutland Place for afternoon and evening shows almost all this month - hoorah for lifts! Call the Ghillie Dhu first to check that the lift is working as it has broken once this season already, and be warned that some of Des's performances have been selling out in advance.

Unfortunately one of the really breathtaking circus shows is outwith Fringe-level prices, but if you're feeling flush, do go along to see Tabu by Nofit State Circus on Leith Links. An international, Bristol-based cast - including two familiar Edinburgh faces. There's a plethora of local performers in many of the multimedia events this year, including some of the entertainers and artists at the Botanics, Inverleith Row (wheelchairs and one powered scooter available to borrow, call in advance)

The Art Festival provides good free schmooze and ents (Fruitmarket Gallery, Market Street is particularly good for that) no matter what the visuals, and as there are multiple venues involved you will find something you like - and can get into - en route (as well as all the street entertainment and doorway beckoners who will offer you activities for the rest of the night- abandoning the gallery plans if necessary!):

Edinburgh Art Festival
Art Late
Friday 13th
6.30pm - 9.30pm

http://edinburghartfestival.com/ Its pretty hard to make out any more information on the website; two of the links are down and there isn't a central listing that I can see.

The same schmoozing and interchangeable pic n mix aspect applies to the Edinburgh International Book Festival in Charlotte Square from this weekend onwards(smooth paths, bumpy doorway sills) Free entry to the garden and you're allowed to bring your own picnic food even though they also sell food at the cafe.

I am biased in favour of the EIBF as I'll be the guest author in the corner of the book shop for Story Shop at 4pm onSunday 15th for fifteen minutes of storytelling. I'll be back again for the book festival's new series of nightly cabaret 'Unbound', as Writers' Bloc hit the Spiegeltent, Charlotte Square Gardens on Tuesday 24th at 9pm till 1am. Free.

If you're outdoors after 10pm on weekday nights, midnight on Saturdays, find a place to watch the Tattoo Fireworks over Edinburgh Castle for free. Best vantage points are along Princes Street, up Calton hill (wheelchair access is by road - but you might need to taxi up that slope) and in Greyfriars Kirkyard, right at the back by Flodden Wall. Smoothish but steep pathway into the graveyard but a top-speed exit down what will now be the hill of doom. Please don't crash into Bobby.

Just in case the city centre traffic fumes are getting to you during your cultural marathon, put these fresh sea air fringe dates into your August planner app:

Friday 13th Burryman's parade, South Queensferry, starting at 8.45am at the Stag's Head Inn and drinking through the village till 6pm

Thursday 19th, The Great Escape, to cycle out (or scooter out!) with Transition University of Edinburgh (staff and students) 10am - 2pm exploring the cycle paths around the city and ending with a picnic (RSVP ben at teu.org.uk - replace at with @)

Saturday 21st Prom on the Prom, afternoon prewar teadance organised by Big Things on the Beach, Portobello

Sunday 22nd Live on the Links concert, Fisherrow Links, Musselburgh

Saturday 28th Big Beach Busk, open event for all entertainers, Portobello promenade, city beach from noon till dawn.

and if you're worrying about what August in Edinburgh is doing to your liver and arteries then fear not, you will be able to swim yourself back to fighting fitness on the 5th September at the Open Water Swimming Festival, Portobello.

Thanks to Guardian Edinburgh for the headsup about The Great Escape! http://www.guardian.co.uk/edinburgh

Big Red Door

2010-08-04T23:21:00.005+02:00

is closing. Debts and arrears are too large to repay in a short time with low income and high expenses. There will be one final month of glorious interactive immersive performance, schmoozing and trick-learning, complete with a rare chance to bid for some auctioned costumes and theatrical decorations. It will be BYOB but there will also be snacks.

This ending is not entirely unsurprising, but its a particularly harsh blow on a personal level because this year I was far too ill to be able to be part of any te POOKa action so dreaming of returning to the bosom of the family kept me going when very little else did. Art college is conveniently a few hundred metres from the Big Red Door on newly refurbished pavements, which was made the whole prospect extra special. I never, ever stop plannning for an arty future!

It doesn't seem real yet as I haven't seen any of the others or heard the words 'The Big Red Door is Closing' out loud.

te POOKa's Big Red Door,
Lady Lawson Street
immersive cabaret with the household of Lord Lawson
starts 9.30pm
Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays throught August
BYOB (corkage)

More on daytime activities and workshops asap.

wheelchair access to events with no fixed abode

2010-08-04T17:30:00.007+02:00

I know I'm biased, but isn't wheelchair access to big (funded) events an obvious requirement - when at all possible? 'We're looking so hard for a new venue' is no longer an excuse after several years, and it isn't valid to be 'looking for the perfect venue' either. Move wheelchair access up higher than corporate identity and ale selection, promptly move to the nearest venue - anything with access, just anything - and I'm sure that astonishingly that elusive perfect venue will be found the very next month. Get someone other than that irrational, demanding, ungrateful, greedy, selfish, passive-agressive party pooper in a wheelchair to ask that access be instated, get the most popular and famous guest to say 'next month we move, we're going here while the organisers choose that perfect venue', and they'll fall over themselves to agree that it is a splendid idea.

I'm not irrational. I'm not demanding - in fact I am usually scared to speak up or mention access or assistance, so scared that my guts hurt and activists kick me for being a total wimp. I'm not greedy (except for toast), good grief I'm not selfish or a party pooper. Yes I can be passive agressive and sometimes it really leaks out, so maybe I should just yell and punch to remove the passive part. But once that's my identity then just my existence is enough to upset folk who like their old upstairs rooms. I should know, I can think of seven people so far who have stuck that label on me (and onto the others who I know). Ouch. It really hurts to be called ungrateful, especially when I've almost fallen out of my chair with excitment and gratitude when people have helped change things or shown interest in making changes! They don't seem to appreciate just how incredibly patient we're being - or how unfair it is to be scowled at and blamed for high blood pressure when all we did was want to join in, and help too.

If any of the problematic organisers were excluded from important events - funded or public event - for YEARS then I think we'd hear screaming and shouting and crying and threats, but they don't seem to have that personal insight. And yet, I haven't fallen out with any of them. I think I'm an optimist, or something.

So I'm quietly still asking and waiting. Again. With enthusiasm and encouragement for the events and for attracting other guests too. Years though, a three year membership in one case, that is taking the piss. If there was ever any doubt, ever any room to wait, understanding that nothing is immediate, the time has passed. Apologies aren't apologies when we hear that publicity has then gone ahead for the existing venue for the next six months, they aren't real apologies when the person making them is looking to be comforted and reassured that its ok, we know they're doing their best. They're doubtful apologies when nothing changes. They're also not apologies when worded as being sorry that the wheely guest 'feels' left out!

I don't know what to do about this. What I do know is that it can't be me, or anyone else on wheels who has already annoyed by joining a membership who does it or else it'll be done with anger, stress and resentment with other guests 'taking sides'. It has to be someone very popular and in demand at an event to tell organisers to change now (nicely and calmly but firmly) and if necessary name the new location and then it'll seem like a great idea. Its basic psychology, unfortunately. Took me a while to learn.

Obviously this doesn't apply to small, unofficial or local groups and meetups or ones immovably in a home of their own already, or ones looking to move venue (actually moving). See, I did say I wasn't unreasonable! But today I feel as though I daren't speak in case I annoy someone about my wheels or my health.

August starts at the beach

2010-08-02T20:37:00.017+02:00

The first day of August featured monsoons and howling gales, but suddenly it all ceased, and the air was warm and calm. There was sudden beachy activity - though the triathalon swimmers were already in the water - not least as the huge dramatic cloud formations with matching monochrome seas had brought out the photographers.

For the wildlife as well as the art.

It was still pissing down across Fife and East Lothian when I gazed out to sea but Portobello beach itself was a strange oasis.

Then the sky dropped again. Right onto my head. I haven't seen Henry (the frog) for two days now - he goes on a crazy bender every time a deluge reaches Biblical proportions, then has to sleep it off in a flowerpot somewhere. I adore the rain too, but I don't fit into a flower pot anymore.